Madam, - In his most recent letter, responding to John Waters (December 8th), Muredach Doherty makes a reference to Amen and goes on to state that the "onerous work" involved in family law "is not helped by pressure groups who sometimes create more difficulties for all concerned in this tragedy of marriage breakdown". As no other group is mentioned in his letter, this is obviously intended as a reference to Amen. This is the second such unsubstantiated attack on this organisation by Mr. Doherty in recent weeks. In his earlier letter (December 2nd) he stated that Amen "create a male dreamland where everyone is at fault except men", but provides no evidence or basis for this assertion.
As far as Amen is concerned, I would ask Mr Doherty if he can point to any statement ever made by Amen which says that "everyone is at fault except men". I would also ask if he can cite any instances where Amen created "difficulties for all concerned in a marriage breakdown".
Far from creating difficulties Amen has provided support for thousands of men whose lives have been shattered by the adversarial family law system which is heavily stacked against them.
The damage done to men's lives will hardly be of any concern to Mr Doherty, given the misandrist comments in his first letter e.g. "we all know that when a marriage breaks up, most women have greater dedication, commitment, while most men moan and aggress into their pints." Perhaps Mr Doherty would clarify who this collective "we" are who know all these things.
The men who contact Amen show unbelievable dedication and commitment to their children, usually at great cost to themselves.
Very few of them would be able to afford pints after the legal system has left them homeless and bled them for every penny they earn.
This sexist stereotyping of separated men and fathers is a disgraceful and unwarranted attack on one of the most persecuted groups in our society.
It is absurd to defend the current family law system as the best means of dealing with the tragedy of marriage breakdown. The aggressive "win at all costs" approach of some lawyers leaves a legacy of hostility causing lasting damage to all concerned, especially children.
The only winners are the legal profession. Unfortunately, less adversarial solutions, which reduce recourse to litigation and share the pain and the gain, will be successfully resisted by the powerful legal profession. - Yours etc.,
MARY T CLEARY, National Co-ordinator, Amen, St. Anne's Resource Centre, Railway Street, Navan, Co Meath.