Putting manners on the rat race

Dealing with a workplace bully doesn't have to be a traumatic experience, according to a new book, writes Rosita Boland

What's the difference between an asshole and a bully? It probably depends on which side of the Atlantic you live. Academic Robert Sutton, who is a psychologist at Stanford University in California, has just published a book entitled The No Asshole Rule: Building a Civilised Workplace and Surviving One That Isn't. It's a wry and useful look at the patterns of bullying in the workplace, focusing on the behaviour of those who practise it, and suggesting coping strategies for those who suffer from it.

"For me, the word 'bully' conveys the more explicit, violent and aggressive form of behaviour," Sutton explains over the phone. "But yes, they do mean more or less the same thing. The main difference in the use of words is maybe with US culture. 'Asshole' is the emotional gut reaction I have when I see someone being abused. In the US world of academia, we don't tend to use the term bullying, we say 'psychological abuse'."

Whatever the semantics, the end result is the same - making your colleagues in the workplace feel demeaned and undermined. In writing this book, Sutton looks at various academic studies that have been carried out on bullying, and also quotes extensively from cases of bullying reported in the media and correspondence he has received from members of the public. How about this as an example of the boss from hell - Hollywood producer Scott Rudin, as reported by the Wall Street Journal, went through 250 personal assistants between 2000 and 2005. Rudin claimed that the actual recorded number was a mere 119,but admitted that this did not include the many additional personal assistants who lasted less than a fortnight.

Are there different patterns of bullying in large organisations, or do bullies behave in a similar way, whether they are in a large, faceless corporation or a smaller, more intimate workplace? "The outcome is the same in both kinds of organisations, but they occur in different ways," Sutton explains. "In small companies, bullying tends to happen face to face. In larger organisations, it filters down from the top. People start learning that this is appropriate behaviour and they copy it. Assholes breed like rabbits: their behaviour is contagious."

Is workplace bullying always about self-conscious displays of power, or is it sometimes the case that people simply behave appallingly and consistently badly? "Certain things happen when you put some people into positions of power," Sutton states. "They become more focused on satisfying their own needs, and they act like the rules don't apply to them. Bullying is almost always about power, but sometimes, when people are in powerful positions, they become less and less clear about how people are regarding them, so that you could say it almost becomes unmeditated. The worst situations of bullying are nearly always in 'I win, you lose' scenarios, where people are working in a performance-related job. And . . . men do seem to be worse offenders when it comes to bullying than women."

SHOULD THERE BE ANY doubt that you are dealing with a colleague who is also an asshole, Sutton recommends carrying out two simple tests. "After talking to the alleged asshole, does the 'target' feel oppressed, humiliated, de-energised, or belittled by the person? In particular, does the target feel worse about himself? And secondly, does the alleged asshole aim his venom at people who are less powerful rather than at those people who are more powerful?"

The profession from which Sutton received the most reports of bullying was the medical sector. "There seems to be a very high level of abusive behaviour going on there. Nurses, students, and junior doctors all have reports of terrible abuse, particularly junior doctors. It's a pattern, and because it's so difficult to make it through the training, the people who've made it through think everyone else who comes after them should then be made to suffer what they had to suffer."

Employment patterns are often quite different in Europe compared with the US: employees this side of the Atlantic generally tend to suffer less from a culture of hiring-and-firing, for instance. However, Sutton doesn't see any corresponding change in the behaviour of workplace bullies. "The only difference is that as a mobile worker, you'll have a different strategy for coping. In short-term work, you only need to endure long enough to get out. If you're stuck in the system, you have to change the way you fight back against the assholes."

In the book, Sutton relates his favourite anecdote given to him by someone being bullied and stuck in the system, and how they dealt with it. A radio producer was constantly being put down and having her personal space invaded by her boss. The boss in question was particularly prone to taking food off her desk, uninvited, even when she asked him to stop. One day, she made chocolates out of chocolate-flavoured laxatives and left them on her desk. They were duly removed and eaten by the boss. He never took any of her food again.

The No Asshole Rule, Building a Civilised Workplace and Surviving One That Isn't, by Robert Sutton, is published by Little, Brown at €14.89

The Sutton test Are you a certified asshole?

Answer true or false

1. You feel surrounded by incompetent idiots - and you can't help letting them know the truth every now and then.

2. You were a nice person until you started working with this bunch of creeps.

3. You don't trust the people around you.

4. You see your co-workers as competitors.

5. You believe that one of the best ways to "climb the ladder" is to push people down or out of the way.

6. You secretly enjoy watching other people suffer and squirm.

7. You are often jealous of your colleagues.

8. You have a small list of close friends and a long list of enemies, and you are equally proud of both lists.

9. You sometimes can't contain your contempt towards the losers and jerks at your workplace.

10. You find it useful to glare at, insult and holler at some of the idiots in your workplace.

11. You take credit for the accomplishments of your team - they would be nowhere without you.

12. You enjoy lobbing "innocent" comments into meetings that serve no purpose other than to humiliate the person on the receiving end.

13. You are quick to point out others' mistakes.

14. You don't make mistakes.

15. You constantly interrupt people.

16. You are constantly buttering up your boss and other powerful people.

17. Your jokes and teasing can get a bit nasty at times, but you have to admit they are pretty funny.

18. You love your immediate team and they love you, but you are all at constant war with the rest of the organisation.

19. You notice that people seem to avoid eye-contact when they talk to you.

20. You have the feeling that people are always very careful what they say around you.

21. People seem hesitant to divulge personal information to you.

22. People seem to stop having fun when you show up.

23. People always seem to react to your arrival by announcing that they have to leave.

Score results:

0-5 true: you don't sound like an asshole unless you are fooling yourself.

5-15 true: you sound like a borderline asshole, perhaps the time has come to start changing your behaviour before if gets worse.

15 or more true: you sound like a full-blown asshole; get help immediately.