Are our TDs at the races? Why of course they are . . .

Ned’s hot tip for the nags; thumbs at the ready in the chamber; going toe to toe with Lee; from Ballineetig to Brussels; dapper Senator charms ladies in Kerry; right pair problem in Oireachtas; festival high-jinks in Meath

ARE OUR TDs at the races? Of course they are. (Thanks to the wonder of satellite television, Rupert Murdoch’s Sky and the Members’ Bar in Dáil Éireann.) Next door, just a partition’s width away but a dull world apart by comparison, the Visitors’ Bar offers two television screens permanently tuned to proceedings in the Dáil and the Seanad, but with no sound.

Deputies and Senators, on the other hand, can watch what they like. Often of an evening, when there’s a big football match on, you can hear the cheers coming from next door as they watch the game. And why not? Politicians are as entitled as everyone else to take a break and watch a match, although one always assumed they were watching terrestrial television.

However, it seems the choice for sports-mad and gambling parliamentarians is somewhat wider. For example, should the racing they require not be on RTÉ, the BBC or C4, they can always tune into Sky’s racing channel, which covers live horse racing morning, noon and night.

Strange, but when we asked some (normally forthcoming) TDs and Senators about this racing channel, they went all coy and pleaded ignorance. One, who did not want to be named, admitted he has seen something called At the Races showing on one of the televisions, but never paid it much attention.

It certainly got a lot of attention on Thursday night, when there was much unwinding around Leinster House with just a week to the summer recess.

The Taoiseach was among a large group of Fianna Fáil deputies and Senators making merry in the Members’ Bar, although he mostly preferred the company of his closest buddies who like to shoot the breeze in the smoking area. Everyone was in the best of good spirits. This was because Biffo, a few of his Ministers and a sizeable number of backbench colleagues had just landed a very nice win on the horses.

We hear it was all thanks to Listowel-based Senator Ned O’Sullivan, who is said to be a better judge of horseflesh than that great student of the turf, Bertie Ahern. Which means he must be very good indeed, given Bertie’s legendary successes with the nags.

Ned, we hear, passed on to a few colleagues a hot tip for the fourth race at Bellewstown. The Taoiseach was tipped the wink, and he was among the many who placed a bet on the Bellewstown Golfcourse Handicap Hurdle.

The Listowel based Senator didn’t lead them astray. As the roars coming from the bar at 7.20pm – it was an evening meet – confirmed, Third-Level Tom romped home at a final price of 4/1. But better still, the politicians had put their money down when the horse was at 6/1, so they all won a tidy pot of money.

Apparently there was a Fianna Fáil fundraiser for the local Meath constituency in Bellewstown on the same night. Little did the organisers know that another successful Fianna Fail fundraiser was going on at the same time in the Dáil bar.

Still, our elected representatives, from Taoiseach and his Ministers down, need all the help they can get when there’s a recession, sorry, race meeting on . . .

They’ll blame it on Charlie McCreevy and say that it’s a legacy of his time in Leinster House....

A-tweetin’ and a-textin’ in the Dáil chamber

Oireachtas members were sent a reminder this week of the “regulations governing the use of mobile phones within the precincts of Leinster House”. It says: “The use of mobile phones by all persons (including Members) shall be strictly prohibited and shall be in ‘switched off’ mode in the following areas: The Dáil and Seanad Chamber; The Committee Rooms where a Committee is sitting therein and The Library.” The rules date from 2003 and are routinely ignored by TDs and Senators. One of the worst offenders is Enda Kenny – when he speaks, his phone regularly interferes with the microphone system. Even the Taoiseach’s phone has been known to ring while he’s been in mid-flow.

Ministers – along with most of the younger deputies – seem to spend half their time texting, while laptops are in regular use and Ciarán Cuffe of The Greens has even “tweeted” from the chamber.

Members can use their phones in the corridors and bars and restaurants, unlike the Great Unwashed, who can only use them outside the building or at two ridiculous little 1970s-style canopies near the bar.

Picture phones are also prohibited.

One presumes politicians and visitors can leave them, along with their Penny Farthings, in the last century.

The Oireachtas committee might be better off issuing members and all-comers a guide to basic mobile telephone etiquette.

Ready to get in the ring with the boy George

Isn’t Fianna Fáil backbencher Michael Mulcahy BL a brave man all the same? The deputy for Dublin South Central issued an e-mail on Thursday challenging Fine Gael’s George Lee to a debate on the economy.

He says: “I am prepared, on any live radio or television programme, to challenge Deputy Lee, head on, to a no-holds-barred debate, comparing the meaningful Fianna Fáil policy with the non-existent Fine Gael policy on the economy. I will not be surprised if Fine Gael fails to take up this challenge, for when it comes to the economy, the Fine Gael ‘emperor’ has no clothes.”

With particular reference to Emperor Lee, Michael writes: “This Government has laid out a clear pathway for the correction of the imbalances in our public finances, and a roadmap to economic recovery. It behoves all Opposition parties, including the main Opposition party, to state with clarity how they believe the structural problems in the Irish economy should be addressed. In particular, Deputy Lee, now almost one month elected to Dáil Éireann, has failed to set out any sort of economic policy, meaningful or otherwise, despite the great fanfare of his election, and the hubris which preceded it.”

Great idea. Hubris is a terrible thing.

Now the only problem for Michael getting his wish granted is that most of the big current affairs programmes on television and radio will be off the air by the end of next week. Unfortunately, the Dáil will be sitting late for most of that week.

However, we have been in contact with Vincent Browne. “I’m sure TV3 would accommodate this debate if this is Deputy Mulcahy’s wish. We’re on the air until July 16th.”

He added: “We always like to have a Fianna Fáil heavyweight on the programme.” Meanwhile, RTÉ’s The Week in Politics, which ends its run tomorrow week, would also do its best to accommodate Michael.

And George is always up for a discussion on the economy.

Hail the conqueringhero returned

Word wings its way from deepest Kerry of the magnificent homecoming afforded to Joe Higgins when he returned to his native Lispole in the wake of his European election triumph.

Bonfires blazed at the crossroads as Joe was conveyed in some style from his home in Ballineetig to O’Sullivan’s bar in Garraí na nTur.

MEP Higgins thought he was going for a few celebratory drinks with his family, but when he arrived in the village, he saw “From Ballineetig to Brussels” inscribed over large displays of his election posters.

According to The Kerryman a huge crowd turned out for the occasion and a Garda car led a parade of vehicles from his home to the pub. Joe was put up into a little wooden hut on a trailer, with traditional musicians belting out the tunes beside him. Then the new MEP for Dublin was carried shoulder high into the pub, where he was introduced onstage by Fear an Tí, Dick Johnson. There were flower for Joe’s mother Nell “An Banríon”, who recently celebrated her 91st birthday.

“You may be representing Dublin in the EU but you’re first and foremost a Lispole man,” Dick said to cheers from the 200-strong crowd.

To mark his achievement, the village presented Joe with a large súgán chair made by local man Danny “Garret” Fitzgerald.

The GAA club gave him a painting of Minard Castle.

He told the gathering that while he will be representing the people of Dublin in Europe, he is happy to deal with any matters of concern that the people of west Kerry might bring to him.

Norris has golf club patter off to a tee

Still in Kerry, where we hear Senator David Norris was guest of honour last Sunday at President’s Day in Killarney Golf and Fishing Club. His Seanad colleague, Paul Coghlan, is the office holder.

“He flew down and did a spot after the prize-giving,” Paul tells us. “It was standing room only and David must have spoken, without notes, for 40 minutes. He went down a bomb – everybody, but particularly the ladies, loved him. He only did a small bit of Joyce.”

Baby talk fills corridors of Leinster House

The resident stork in Leinster House is on double pay and exhausted. More babies.

Labour Senator Michael McCarthy and his wife Nollagh are celebrating the arrival of their first child – Oran Peter, born eight days ago in Cork University Hospital, where Nollagh is a midwife.

“Politics can take over sometimes,” Dunmanway-based Michael tells us. “When somebody said to me recently: ‘The big day is coming’, I replied ‘That’s right. Polling day is on Friday and then the count is on Saturday’.”

Meanwhile, Fianna Fáil Senator Lisa McDonald gave birth to her first child, daughter Caragh Megan Simpson, in Wexford General two weeks ago. Lisa and husband Richard are over the moon, as are her party colleagues in the Seanad. However, Lisa’s absence provides another headache for party whip Diarmuid Wilson, who has had a few close calls with votes recently.

Typically for Leinster House, not a great deal of thought has been given to the subject of maternity leave. Women who have just had babies are not automatically entitled to a voting pair with a deputy or Senator on the other side. There are no agreements among the parties on exempting women on maternity leave from attending for votes.

Party whips would show latitude in such a situation, but gallantry goes out the window when there’s a crucial vote and the Government is relying on a small majority. It is not unknown for people to be hauled in from hospital beds.

But Labour Party Senator Phil Prendergast says she intends to “pair” with Senator McDonald, or abstain from voting, until her FF colleague returns to work. “We don’t do pairing in the Labour Party, but I will definitely make sure that Lisa does not feel pressurised to return to Leinster House too soon. As a midwife, I know this is one time in your life when you really have to be with your baby, so no matter what the whip says to me I’ll not be voting.”

Political animals lap up Trim Swift bash

The second annual Trim Swift Festival is already is full swing – it was officially opened on Thursday by native son and Meathman in the Cabinet Noel Dempsey.

Today’s big row starts at 7pm in the Castle car park, when George Hook will referee a tannoy debate between Joan Burton TD, Senator Mark Daly, Mary Lou McDonald and local solicitor Paul Moore, among others.

Check the Trim Swift Festival website.