"When I put the ball in the net I didn't know what to do, didn't know how to celebrate. I didn't know, so I just ran. I bet I looked a fool on television." - Phil Neville (left) after scoring his first-ever Manchester United goal, at Chelsea.
"We won't get relegated because Doncaster make us look like Juventus" - Brighton fans' spokesman Ian Hart on why the Seagulls will survive in Nationwide League Division Three.
"I almost withdrew five minutes before I teed off, and if someone had said I'd win I'd have said he was crazy. I'd have smashed his face and said `wake up!' - Jose Maria Olazabal amazed that he had won the Dubai Desert Classic having been advised to withdraw from the event due to sickness.
"I do the odd exhibition but I have my heart set on a comeback." - Twice world champion Alex Higgins ponders an unlikely return to the big time.
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