Home weddings: Going to the garden ... and we’re going to get married

For many people, the arrival of summer heralds the start of the wedding season — and with it the flurry of frantic last-minute additions and changes to the arrangements. Organised chaos is part and parcel of any wedding ceremony but for many people, having their nuptials, or at least the catering side of things, at home can make it, if not more relaxed, then certainly a more intimate affair.

This is true of Clodagh and Alan Weir from Kildare who married in 2021, at Clodagh’s family home in Clare. They felt that a wedding in familiar surroundings would be “unique and personal” and having experienced a marriage ceremony at a friend’s home, they decided to follow suit and do the same.

“It was very special to be able to celebrate in the garden at home,” says Clodagh. “We put a lot of time into researching suppliers for the marquee, catering, music, photographer, videographer and even toilets but this added to the experience in terms of being fully involved in all aspects of the planning. Also, my mom put in trojan work getting the garden in order for the big day, no flower bed was left unturned. We got married as Covid restrictions were lifting, so we had a smaller number of guests than planned, but we still kept to our original plan of having a marquee, catering and entertainment. Luckily, the weather was really on our side and we had our drinks reception at the front of the house, and then the dinner reception in the back garden in the marquee.”

Of course, a lot of work is involved in having it at home, but as Clodagh notes, “the reward is that you have a wedding personal to you, exactly as you want it to be”.

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The couple put up festoon lighting and firepits for the evening in the days leading up to the event and their marquee, from classicmarquees.ie, was set up a couple of days in advance, while Caterhire delivered all the essentials for the day, so their planner, Kate Deegan, and her team were able to start setting up.

“You are so dependent on suppliers so my advice to others planning a wedding at home would be to build a solid relationship with them. Ours removed their equipment the day after the wedding, so we only had to tidy up our own items and whatever was left in the bar. We would also suggest that it is helpful to have someone to come in to help clean up in the house, as you want to be able to relax and enjoy both the day itself and the days after,” says Clodagh.

“It might be more work than having the wedding in a venue but we wouldn’t have changed a thing — and without a doubt, the day would not have run so smoothly without the help of our co-ordinator.”

Niamh and Gavin Satchwell live in Kildare with their children Willow (8) and Rhea (5). They married in 2016, as Niamh says that her husband really wanted to have a wedding at home on the family farm — and while there was quite a bit of work involved, it was really worth the effort.

“Having a wedding at home was always really important to Gavin, who is a farmer, and always wanted to have a big marquee and be surrounded by the cattle and green fields. It was genuinely, extremely special and we were lucky that our circumstances offered us the opportunity to do it.”

Niamh concedes that it was “daunting initially” when you realise what an undertaking you are embarking on.

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“Everything has to be picked out, from carpet colour to tablecloths and delph. At the time, we also had quite a young child, which doesn’t facilitate event planning too readily. So, we decided to use a wedding planner to help bring our ideas together seamlessly and although Gavin was a little sceptical about the need for this, he now readily admits that we wouldn’t have had such an incredible day without her.”

The couple had a marquee on the lawn at the front of the farmhouse, and as they wanted to be able to see out into the fields while inside, it had clear walls.

“The animals were a huge part of our day and a talking point — we had sheep, cattle and donkeys right beside us and our dogs happily trotted in and out of the marquee too, delighted with all of the attention that they received.”

For Niamh, having a home wedding “is more than worthwhile”, if you have the time and space to do what will work for you.

“It’s always going to be remembered because the setting is unique to you, with the opportunity to have a truly individual day where you get to pick each and every detail. And it is guaranteed that none of your guests will have been to a wedding at the venue before.”

She advises delegating to make the day run smoothly.

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“Asking for help will take a lot of the pressure off you and people actually like to help. So, I promise anybody who is even half thinking of having their wedding at home, that it is really worth it — so just go for it.”

Wedding planner Kate Deegan, of Co-Ordination Made Easy (co-me.net), says that many people look into the idea of having a wedding at home, but when they see what is involved and how much it costs, they change their minds. But, she says that everyone who goes ahead with it, is thrilled with the results and she has some top tips to help things go smoothly. She says the cost for a typical wedding at home will start at about €15,000.

“A wedding at home in a marquee is the most amazing and memorable event,” she says. “The guest list is always the first thing a couple should look at when planning their wedding, and a marquee is no different as you don’t want people to be crammed into a limited space. So, see what space you have, bearing in mind that you may need another area for the drinks reception, and you also have to have a Plan B if the weather isn’t good.

Deegan suggests you get an experienced caterer who has done marquee weddings before, “as they are a huge undertaking”. Remember that the caterers will likely also need their own marquee for a kitchen set-up that they can properly work from.

“Food vans are very popular, but more so for day two or for a very relaxed boho style wedding where people are not all sitting and dining at once — but it does lend to a great relaxed atmosphere. But again, to achieve a ‘relaxed’ atmosphere you need to be well organised.”

When it comes to decor, you will have a lot more freedom than you would in a hotel. Deegan says there are many new trends around with coloured linen, hanging features from the ceiling and bringing in elements of the garden, such as a fountain (at one venue) which was a beautiful centrepiece for a drinks reception marquee.”

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The experienced event planner says hiring someone to help organise the day is crucial as there are so many elements to ensuring everything runs smoothly.

“I even bring staff with me for a marquee wedding as there is so much extra work involved to make it all go seamlessly. Everyone has to pull together — from the marquee provider to the caterers and bar staff and everyone in between. Also, the family has to be on board to get other areas sorted — it’s a great excuse to get to those jobs around the house which have been waiting for years to be done.

Kate Deegan’s tips for the perfect home wedding:

• First, go for it as you won’t regret it.
• Hire a planner as there is so much involved and you don’t have the ease of a hotel manager looking after you and your guests.
• Don’t overlook car parking, security, toilets, cleaners, PA system, heating, generator and skip hire.
• Make sure to have a backup plan for bad weather.
• Do your research and choose people with a good reputation.
• And most importantly, enjoy the process, it’s your wedding day and with the right planning it will be amazing.