Weary smiles only sign of celebration on pale faces

Eight months, 18 subjects, 20 projects, 10 presentations and 16 exams later I'm standing on the other side of the MBA (Masters in Business Administration) with just the small matter of a thesis left to face.

The summer exams - in contrast with the seven-day-nine-exam nightmare at Christmas - were spread evenly over a two-and-a-half week period in a stroke of uncharacteristically strong UCD planning. Although I felt this was infinitely preferable, there were times when I thought I had finally been consigned to my Orwellian Room 101 "exam limbo" and it would never end.

But it did, and on a predictably wet Wednesday in a period of otherwise unbroken sunshine (some things will never change). I consciously tried to savour those last minutes as people handed up their final exam paper. Looking around the crowded sports hall at all the tired pale faces, the only overt signs of celebration were weary smiles of relief. The rest of the day was very much marked by an anticlimactic air of suspended disbelief.

It was interesting to see on that day of celebration that the class very neatly divided itself between those who sought instant gratification; those who invested in the long haul; and those opting for a Good Meal and a Nice Rest in the afternoon. I really hope it wasn't a metaphor for post-MBA life, as I took the somewhat shorter daylight celebration option. It was all going very well until classmates began arriving looking fluffed, buffed and ready for an evening's revelry. At that stage I had a large bubble over my head with big pictures of burgers and chips floating about in it.

That's another thing about exam periods. Suddenly you feel utterly justified in eating twice your body weight over a three-week period. Meal times disappear, and consumption patterns disintegrate into one long graze. Downing another packet of Eskimo Mints I remind myself it's essential to keep my strength up, but can't help wondering if I'm not unselfishly eating on someone else's behalf also.

A lot of people have asked me whether it has been worth all the pain, and I would have to say every minute. Even the minutes when I lost track of what I was saying during a class presentation. Even the minutes when I thought if the same person "contributed" their tuppence worth in the lecture again I would have to be physically restrained. Even the minutes when Financial Reporting moved into a galaxy far, far beyond my understanding.

This and many more awful moments were more than adequately compensated for by the fact that the pain was shared. Everybody was experiencing the same pressure. One person's strength tended to be another person's weakness, making it possible for each person to contribute something of value and enhance the collective experience.

I think most of my classmates would agree that the MBA is not necessarily about tackling complex or difficult subjects - apart from the odd one or two - but it is more about handling and managing large volumes of work. With most three-hour lectures accompanied by an equivalent three hours reading, and a constant stream of project and presentation deadlines, there is always something else that needs to be done as a matter of major importance. Once you get used to the terrible guilt associated with the workload it's just a matter of prioritising the tasks.

And the reading is endless. I could not believe that so much could be written on the minutiae of business administration. Two modules on the course were dedicated to the subjects of Team Working and Organisational Change, and the body of writing around these subjects is breathtaking. No amount of strategising and number crunching, however fancy, can fully account for the Human Factor. The commitment and co-operation of an organisation's people are the primary factors that can make or break an organisation, yet this simple idea seems to continually get lost in the chasm between the front line and the boardroom.

Because the MBA is a US phenomenon, at times the strong US orientation of the theory was a bit overwhelming. Everything seemed to be about growth, focus, ratios and competitive advantage. Entrepreneurialism, individual self-worth and, God help us, ethics, all seemed to take a back seat. While these themes may not be high on the wish-list of big business right now, increasingly it looks like they could be the sources of advantage in the future.

Like it or not the MBA and its success depends very much on the competitiveness of those applying themselves to it. Nobody wants to let themselves down in front of their team or their peers. It is a given that there are always people who would like to see you stumble, and it's rarely the lecturer. In ways then, MBA conditions aren't far off working life in a big organisation, except any gain or stumble you make is entirely personal.

Since last October I have been extremely fortunate to meet a group of bright, energetic and extremely diverse people. They have made me laugh, irritated me to distraction, surprised me greatly and shown nothing but respect and empathy for each other's struggle. While many will go on to enjoy career success, I think all will benefit from those moments of vulnerability, uncertainty and humility we experienced in the last year. Academic learning is only half the MBA process, it is in the other half where the real value lies.

Madeleine Lyons can be contacted at lyons@ireland.com