It is little surprise that the US Tour's official website (www.pgatour.com) devotes considerable space to highlighting the achievements of their star attraction, Tiger Woods.
The trouble for them, the trouble for all of us soon, will be finding anything new to say. Post Pebble, the website turned to columnist Ron Green for a fresh take on Tiger. Green came up with the following:
Tiger is Elvis. He is Springsteen. He is Pavarotti. He is Puff Daddy.
His golf is lightning and twilight. It is a hammer and a mother's kiss. It is cannon fire and a lullaby.
He is creme brulet. He is a hot dog with everything on it.
Tiger is a cheeseburger deluxe.
We are not making this up. We quickly clicked to the statistics section. Websites, Americans and Golf Masters' staff prefer statistics. There were 111 listings for Tiger in 33 categories. Statistics deluxe. Statistics with everything (including birdie conversion percentage (36.3), total putts (1,152) and par three average (2.94)).
Tiger dominates our own statistics as well and this season is providing the best demonstration of the importance of transfers. He has been idle for nine of our 16 weeks but when active has averaged winnings of £107,024 per tournament. You can't live with him and you can't live without him - so transfer him repeatedly.
We're hardly going out on a limb by suggesting that this pattern of idleness and earning is likely to continue but to answer a fax from Shane Lee (second overall with Woody 1), there is no single, definitive source of all golfers' schedules. Read this newspaper, surf the net, use your intuition and hope for a bit of luck. One thing for sure is that Woods isn't in action this week but we confidently predict that he will be St Andrews for the British Open next month.
Colin Montgomerie has announced that he won't play in the Irish Open but our most employed player, Darren Clarke (6,213 teams), will be there.
How to transfer
If you have a team entered in the Golf Masters you can check its score and position, remind yourself of the line-up or change any of the information you left when entering by calling the numbers below at any time.
Transfers may be conducted each Tuesday and Wednesday during the competition with up to four transfers allowed per team. These four may be made all at one time or singly over the duration of the competition. It is important to remember, however, that you must at all times have seven players in your team, at least one of whom must be Irish, and you must stay within the £12.5 million budget.
If you wish to transfer you should have your team's PIN number ready before calling the competition number.
1550 92 49 05 (Republic of Ireland)
0906 604 0100 (Northern Ireland and Britain)
Calls cost 58p per minute in the Republic of Ireland and 60p per minute in Northern Ireland and Britain - all charges include VAT.
Competition helpline: 01-2844060 between 10.0 am and 5.30 pm (Monday to Friday). Normal telephone charges apply to this number. Service provided by Phonovation Ltd.
