Modesty stops us gloating

Oh Lord it's so hard to be humble . . . yes, it's time to update you on the progress of Golf Masters HQ's very own Dream Team, which, as you know, we would have entered at registration time if the rules had allowed. It's just as well for Colin Rutherford's sake that we were barred by that antiquated and abominable rule that forbids employees from taking part in competitions run by their own employers because we'd now be £105,550 clear of our current leader - with four (count 'em) transfers still to make. Ernie Els is our top man, justifying our prediction back in March (granted, an unrecorded one) that by August he'd have won almost as much as Tiger Woods, despite costing half a million less. Darren Clarke, our Irish representative, has won us £557,750, making his £3.3 million price tag seem a snip.

The remaining five members of our team - Jose Coceres, Fredrik Jacobson, Robert Allenby, Nick O'Hern and Roger Chapman - who cost a mere £4 million combined, have brought in a healthy haul of £1,624,599. Team total: £3,103,899. Modesty prevents us from gloating, almost (just in case you missed it first time, team total: £3,103,899).

Of course the eagle-eyed among you might recall us crowing about our Dream Team a couple of months back, the line-up of which bore no relation whatsoever to our current one. Well, we can only assume that an error in the printing stage of that day's newspaper was responsible for the inclusion in our Dream Team of several players who have since disappeared without a trace (a fib we will no doubt repeat when we give you a final update on our boys after week 29).

The dream team

205 Ernie Els (5.0) 921,550

101 Darren Clarke (3.3) 557,750

308 Jose Coceres (1.5) 433,788

406 Fredrik Jacobson (0.5) 368,550

347 Robert Allenby (1.0) 301,583

412 Nick O'Hern (0.5) 276,416

405 Roger Chapman (0.5) 244,262

How to transfer

If you have a team entered in the Golf Masters you can check its score and position, remind yourself of the line-up or change any of the information you left when entering by calling the numbers below at any time.

Transfers may be conducted each Tuesday and Wednesday during the competition with up to four transfers allowed per team. These four may be made all at one time or singly over the duration of the competition. It is important to remember, however, that you must at all times have seven players in your team, at least one of whom must be Irish, and you must stay within the u £12.5 million budget.

If you wish to transfer you should have your team's PIN number ready before calling the competition number:

1550 92 49 05 (Republic of Ireland)

0906 604 0100 (Northern Ireland and Britain)

Calls cost 58p per minute in the Republic of Ireland and 60p per minute in Northern Ireland and Britain - all charges include VAT.

Competition helpline: 01-2844060 between 10.0 am and 5.30 pm (Monday to Friday). Normal telephone charges apply to this number. Service provided by Phonovation Ltd.