Tom Humphries/Manager's quotes An interrogation in two parts.Part One: Lokomotiv StadiumThe press conference descends as rapidly as the Irish performance which preceded it, into farce. Mick McCarthy wears his tight-lipped smile and his stern blue suit. His Russian hosts don their party clothes. This was never going to be a happy time.

"Please comment to this game," asks the Russian translator. Sternly, like an interrogator in old Ljubjanka jail.

"It's been a bad day at the office for us in terms of defending," says McCarthy. "I think we came here certainly trying to win the game and I believed we could. We've conceded goals - it's the first time we've conceded four goals - we've conceded goals which we wouldn't normally concede and we've been disappointed. We have to consider and concentrate on the next game.

"I can't do anything about this. It's a disappointing defeat. It's about motivation for all of us for the next game. Winning the game at home, which is important.

"Tonight has been disappointing but despite that we scored two goals. I wouldn't expect to score two goals away from home and come away being beaten under normal circumstances."

A translation follows. While it is unfolding in great detail and in throaty Russian, the bar just behind us in the press area is filled with ruddy-faced merrymakers. And the PA begins blasting out a happy tune. Will ye come, will ye come, will ye come to the bower.

"So, any questions?"

Irish journalist: "The early mistakes, did they effect confidence?" Mick McCarthy: "Perhaps, they set the tone for it."

Translator: "Excuse me. I must translate this question.

PA: "Will ye come will ye come . . ."

Russian journalist: "Translate please this."

Translator: "Repeat the question."

PA: "To the bower."

Irish journalist: "Did the early mistakes effect confidence in defence?

Translator: "Excuse me. Again."

PA: "Will ye come, will ye . . ."

Irish journalist (slowly): "Damage confidence. Did they damage confidence?

Russian translation follows as continued questioning about accompanying certain parties to the bower plays over the PA.

MM: "Can I speak now?"

Translator: "Yes."

MM: "I don't think the start to the game - well that's not us. We usually play it forward and pen them in and play at a high tempo. Giving them an early chance didn't do us any favours, of course. Whether it had an effect on the long-term game . . . I can't put that defending down to that early start. We got out of that lethargy."

By now the noise level is becoming an issue. The folk at the bar are whooping it up. The journalists are talking among themselves. The translator and the chair of the press conference are having a little sidebar chat.

"They had a lot of movement and athletic power. Was it a lack of concentration or was it the Russian team? The first goal was a very poor goal to give away. The second one, we lost it, we tried to play it out, lost it at front, it came back and it ended in the back of the net. So we're 2-0 down and chasing the game.

"We're talking chances. I don't think their pace and power and movement caused us as many problems in the first half as it did in the second half. We're chasing the game. From 2-0 down we're chasing it all the time. We have to. We have to try and take chances.

"I think perhaps they looked better - pace and power - than perhaps they are. I have to give one or two of their players credit. Played quite well."

The translator moves in. While the words are being recast in Russian the Irish questions continue. It's dog eat dog now, there having been a breach of protocol earlier when the Russians didn't bother to translate any of their own manager's answers.

McCarthy speaks of Robbie Keane, of the gambles he took in the second half. The Russians growl among themselves.

The translator has had enough. One senses the Gulag beckoning for McCarthy. He makes a request, sublimely oblivious to newspaper deadlines and stuff like that.

"Could somebody who understands Russian please take my answers down and after I've given them to the Russian journalists? It would make life a lot easier for all of us and I would appreciate it."

The request is ignored totally. As it is translated it provokes hoots of Russian laughter. There is some Russian spoken at the table. More laughter.

A Russian journalist asks if the result was a fair one. You can tell it's his favourite question, the one he always asks to demonstrate his keen insight.

"Could have been more goals," begins McCarthy, when - swoosh! - a sliding tackle from the same source.

"Would the presence of Roy Keane, in football terms, have made a difference?" The name of Roy has now been uttered before the High Priest McCarthy. We await thunder and lightning in the sky.

"Perhaps," says McCarthy. "I've said all along I'm not going to hide from this. Not if he's recovering from a bad hip it wouldn't have tonight. He may well not have played anyway. That's something I can't do anything about.

"It's not going to make any odds if after every game it's going to be dragged up as to whether we can play better without him. We're always a better side with him, he's a world class player. I can't deny that. That's as plain as the nose on my face. But he ain't here, he's not going to be here. I can't effect that."

Another question. More Russian laughter. The translator and the chairman are in comedic cahoots. McCarthy has had enough. "It started as a farce and it's descending below that." he says. He gets up and he leaves quickly.

Part Two: Sheremetievo Airport, Moscow.

Mick walks into a little glass-walled cubicle. We follow him in. The Sunday papers have savaged him. He doesn't know it yet but he must expect it.

He's coming to terms with the night before. Trying to put answers to his own questions. He has his own inquest to perform first. With his butt offering the first parma-thin slice to the infamous bacon slicer he needs to see us media like he needs, well, a 4-2 spanking.

"I don't think we were over-confident. You don't suddenly get over-confident and arrogant coming to Russia for a game. I knew they had good players. No surprises either. The tempo of the game was very high from the start. If we beat them in Dublin that result is finished with. We have to beat them in Dublin now."

Was he shocked by what he saw?

"I was surprised. We've not defended like that, given goals away like that. We chased the game, it became open. I take the positives. We were two down, came back to 2-1. The third goal was the killer goal. At half time I said if we get one we'll not be beaten in this game."

We dance awhile. Talk about the positives. Eliminate the negatives. Discuss how we've become a scalp to be hung on other belts.

One question left to be asked. McCarthy won't accept it but it has to be asked. Roy Keane. Any change in the weather?

"It's something we . . ." McCarthy breaks off. Starts again. "He's got a hip injury, he's out with that. He said he's not going to play. It's not going to change, that situation.

"You know better than I. You speak to him on a more regular basis. Why don't you go chat to Roy? That's not for me. I think that situation is far beyond repair. I think you'll find that the guy has told everybody that. It's not going to make it any different. I'm getting on with the team I've got. These are the lads I'm concerned about."

Could it be worth one final try?

"I'm not going to even go down that road."

No? "I'm done guys. Thanks for your time." He exits abruptly for the second time in 12 hours, his wounds still fresh.