Ireland’s relationship with Britain

Sir, – Perusing the recent series of articles and letters on the wonder that is Britain, not to mention the subliminal visual cue of the Union Jack in the colours of the Irish flag (clever, that), I felt an odd mixture of wry amusement and dismay ("Neighbours: Britain and Ireland", September 17th). Good Lord, an uninitiated observer might wonder, what on earth was our problem, all these years? Apart from one middle-aged Belfast native, who recalled the vicious, sectarian Northern Ireland of his youth, propped up by occasional state-sponsored terrorism (don't mention the war), this was quite a love-in.

Like most people who grew up in Ireland, I, too, had no problem with the co-existence of Top of the Pops, Irish music and feiseanna, Coronation Street, Glenroe, the GAA, Enid Blyton, Irish fairy tales and the Beano in my life.

The majority of English people I have met socially or professionally, I have generally found to be kind, friendly and helpful. They do not, as a rule, preoccupy my mind in any particularly negative way.

However, this constant need to seek validation from our former masters and our continual navel-gazing (not a practice the English indulge in) is not only tiresome but alarming. In spite of the frequent dismissive exhortation to “get over the 800 years of oppression thing”, the legacy of colonisation has a long reach.

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Like an abusive domestic relationship, it involves a mix of threats, begging, cajoling, violence, bullying, put-downs, flattery, phoney remorse and flattened self-esteem, but the most crucial element in maintaining control in such a relationship is the ability of the dominant partner to convince their victim that the latter cannot live without them.

This, we seem to have accepted without question. In fact, one can see a direct correlation between our current supine attitude toward multinationals (“Don’t make them mad – they’ll leave and we won’t be able to cope”) and our “please like me” relationship with our neighbour.

We have been in a softening-up process for a while, now. As Fintan O’Toole has pointed out, it is no accident that UK ads are no longer dubbed in an Irish voice for the Irish market. It is also no accident that Dublin is now included in a weather summary list of British cities, at the bottom of the Sky News screen – more subliminal cueing – or that Irish actors are being styled “British” for entertainment awards; nor that many of our major institutions and utilities now have British chief executives.

The latest, most astounding example, of this insidious practice is that of Clare Tomlinson of Sky Sports, referring to the recent Dublin-Mayo GAA match as “the ‘All-England’ final in Croke Park”.

Brexit has accelerated this process. A whiff of panic has come in the door and subtlety is flying out the window. Britain will need whatever (and whomever) it can get onside, in order to bolster its strength in the cold, lonely post-EU world into which it is headed.

The fact is that we are in the middle of a bloodless coup. While we are being patronisingly urged to embrace a “mature” relationship with Britain (a somewhat loaded term), it is important to be aware that for some, that means an eventual reabsorption into the UK “family” – sure, aren’t we all the same? Keep your ears open – that suggestion will be coming soon.

We need to stop seeing ourselves purely in relation to these people. It is both possible and desirable to conduct peaceful, cordial and respectful relations with a former adversary. It is also possible to enjoy the things we admire about the other, along with whatever we have in common. It is not necessary to become them, in order to do so – nor to forget where we’ve come from.

Brexit provides an excellent opportunity for Ireland, once and for all, to break that economic, social and psychological dependence on Britain.

When we finally discover that we can survive, we will, perhaps, be able to redefine our relationship – not only with Britain but with the rest of the world – for the benefit of all concerned. – Yours, etc,

JESSICA FREED,

Dublin 12.