DAIL SKETCH:SNOW WAS general over Leinster House yesterday.
So was the spectre of the potentially political dead on the Fianna Fáil benches.
The prospect of an electoral hammering is stalking the Soldiers of Destiny within every cumann throughout the dark central plain, on the treeless hills, across the Bog of Allen and on the shores of the dark mutinous Shannon waves.
James Joyce’s story The Dead came to mind as the Dáil had its last pre-budget gathering.
There was some bonhomie, but mostly angst and conflict and tense personal and political relationships evident in the exchanges.
The bonhomie emerged as tributes were paid by all sides of the House to retiring head usher Shay Byrne, on the staff since 1973, and colleague Liam Lynch who has served for a decade.
Ceann Comhairle Seamus Kirk noted how the highly efficient and always courteous head usher had, over the years, witnessed the “euphoria of elections and the hard realities of defeat of government and members alike”.
Tánaiste Mary Coughlan remarked that the head usher might, perhaps, have made a better go of it over the years “than some of us”.
There was some nervous laughter from the Government benches.
Fine Gael leader Enda Kenny noted how Lynch, in his previous job, was “a craftsman in terms of his wielding of the knife in the butcher business and could teach many of us lessons in regard to cuts”.
Tributes and applause over, the political knives came out in earnest.
Labour leader Eamon Gilmore waved a copy of the memorandum of understanding and warned the Government benches that his party would not be bound by it. He wanted the debate on it to continue into next week.
Gilmore was supported on the issue by an equally vitriolic Caoimhghín Ó Caoláin, of Sinn Féin.
Coughlan said that important budgetary decisions would be made next week and TDs would be provided with an opportunity to debate them.
Fine Gael’s Charlie Flanagan said the only power the Dáil had was to discuss the weather.
Labour’s Willie Penrose also referred to the memorandum of understanding, revealing that he had been up until the early hours “reading the bloody thing”.
It was another case of a sleepless political night, following on from Minister for the Environment John Gormley’s reference to his nights without rest in the Government “asylum” earlier on this week.
Fine Gael and Labour want occupancy of that asylum as soon as possible.
They are giddy at the prospect of power in the spring of next year, knowing that they will sleep soundly, free of the dreary shackles of opposition.
“According to some people, we are living in an asylum here,” said Kenny. “And if it gets too hot, some people should leave the kitchen.”
Meanwhile party colleague Lucinda Creighton remarked: “The lunatics are running the asylum.”
Proceedings finished early to allow staff get home in the snow. TDs made their way back to their constituencies, some, perhaps, contemplating a Joycean-like exile to escape these hard political and climatic times.
