TD of the Year:AN ALL-FEMALE shortlist. Women deputies are very much in the minority, but they make a contribution that more than compensates for the gender imbalance.
Mary Hanafin fought a difficult corner in Social Welfare and is one of just a few Ministers the Government can put out in front of a camera without fretting that she’ll put her foot in it.
Labour’s Kathleen Lynch brings a delicious but often hard-edged brand of Cork wit and common sense to Dáil proceedings.
She takes no guff from uppity deppities when presiding in the chair. After John O’Donoghue was forced to hang up his cloak, it was universally agreed that Kathleen would make a fine Ceann Comhairle – except there wasn’t ever a hope in hell of her getting the job.
Fine Gael’s Lucinda Creighton put in a very strong performance during the Lisbon Treaty referendum and continued to cause welcome ructions in her stodgy parliamentary party during the year.
Our winner just pips Labour’s Joan Burton, who had a superb 12 months but was too constrained by the heavy demands of her finance portfolio to act the maggot when the mood took her.
TD of the Year is Fianna Fáil veteran Mary O’Rourke, who shone from the Government backbenches, frequently giving some of her flashier, namby-pamby colleagues a master-class in straight talking. She led the revolt on the unions’ Twelve Days of Christmas unpaid leave wheeze, and sure what the hell if the outcome reflected particularly well on her nephew Brian Lenihan? Granted, up and coming TDs might grumble that Mammy O’Rourke can enjoy the luxury of being outspoken now that she isn’t scrapping for preferment, but nonetheless she displayed an energy and backbone so often lacking in the younger intake. Always worth listening to in the chamber, she’s a fully paid-up member of that ever dwindling band of TDs who can string together a coherent speech without recourse to a script.
Awarding this worthless accolade to Mammy will also irritate a lot of our more pompous deputies, which is a nice bonus.
This leads us on neatly to a related matter.
The Very Bestest Minister for Finance in the Whole Wide World and If You Don’t Agree You’ll Have to Answer to Auntie Award
Take another bow, Mary O’Rourke.
Senator of the Year
Why?
Minister of the Year
Micheál Martin (foreign affairs) and Dermot Ahern (justice) performed solidly, with the angelic Micheál coming out on top in the good news photo op department thanks to successful hostage releases in Africa and the Philippines.
Cabinet bruiser Dermot fitted comfortably into the tough guy role. (Not a bad image to have when people say they want strong leadership.) His speech on the steps of Government Buildings following the publication of the Murphy report was held up in favourable contrast to the Taoiseach’s truly awful response in the Dáil. Both Ministers are busy marking time, and each other, mindful that Brian Cowen won’t be staying on for ever as leader of Fianna Fáil.
But as Micheál and Dermot were treading water, a relative newcomer to the succession stakes stormed up on their inside and is now firmly installed as the man they both need to beat. After a shaky start to the year, when a worrying lack of experience in matters economic threatened to snuff out his promising career and gave petrified citizens a major headache, Minister for Finance Brian Lenihan emerged from Cowen’s cobblywobbling Cabinet as media darling and the man most likely to succeed.
How did he manage that? Lenihan is Mr Economy, the bogeyman selling us the bank bailouts, the Snip saga, the potential nightmare of Nama and tough budgets (this month’s was lauded by most of the media, yet there’s something that feels not right about it). The two Brians are publicly following the same path of economic correction, battling through our crisis together. But while Cowen is routinely lambasted about the measures by a suspicious nation and commentariat, Lenihan glides past the carnage.
Biffo flounders as he spouts jargon-filled economic bulletins to the Dáil; Lenny puts himself about on radio and television, peddling the same line as his boss, but doing so clearly and with a sense of purpose. His command of his brief is now impressive – even the Opposition privately praised his handling of the Nama debate.
Lenihan manages to project an air of intelligence and confidence, laced with that ever-so-slightly bumbling charm of his late father. He can do little wrong at the moment.
When economist David McWilliams revealed that a somewhat frazzled Lenihan turned up at his door in the early hours of the morning seeking advice on the banking crisis (while chewing raw garlic to keep his energy levels up), McWilliam was excoriated (rightly) for breaking a confidence. It was all “Poor Brian,” and wasn’t he right to go outside the stuffy confines of the Civil Service to find out the thinking in the real world? Cowen would probably have emerged from the same scenario cast as a headless chicken in a suit who had no business being out at that hour of the morning.
The two Brians are asking the country to take a massive leap of trust with them. But there is only one, it seems, with whom we are willing to jump.
Minister of the Year: Brian Lenihan
Spokesperson of the Year, or the Blah, Blah, Blah Award for Best Background Noise
It’s tough, being in opposition. Never getting to speak first. Always getting the second string analysts to your press conferences when the Government has some piffling announcement to make. Always giving out, because it’s your job to oppose.
Now that the boom has stopped getting boomier and the bust is getting bustier, it’s never been a better time to be in Opposition. Which brings it down to a straight fight between Fine Gael’s Richard Bruton and Labour’s Joan Burton – Best Boy and Best Girl in the class.
Both have been very impressive performers, making valuable interventions during debates on the economy. They are forensic in their dissection of financial legislation, tireless and hardworking, and above all, they know – and you know they know – what they are talking about.
But the award goes to Joan Burton, Labour’s finance spokeswoman and their stand-out star of the show this year. She is consistently on top of her brief, her work-rate and enthusiasm is phenomenal and she – more than the courtly Richard Bruton – manages time and again to throw the commanding Brian Lenihan off his stride. This is wonderful when it happens, particularly as they are constituency rivals. Joan is delighted with herself and brainy Brian (he’s ever so bright, you know) sulks.
As a female TD, Deputy Burton also has to endure patronising comments from Fianna Fáil’s backbench wide-boys when she speak in the chamber.
Should anyways, what would a woman know about sums?
Senator of the Year, if you must
Fine Gael leader Enda Kenny threw the cat among the pigeons when he announced he wanted to abolish the Seanad and would hold a referendum on the issue if/when he gets into government. The Senators, who have a great regard for themselves, were appalled. That included many of Enda’s contingent, who weren’t told about his plan and had to hear it from journalists.
On the plus side, there was suddenly an upsurge in interest in the goings-on in the Seanad, and while Senators showcased their hurt and indignation they were only delighted with all the attention.
Front-runners for this award will always, boringly, come from the ranks of the Independent Senators, and most likely, from that naughty triumvirate of Joe O’Toole, David Norris and Shane Ross. But there are some who deserve honourable mention.
Fianna Fáil’s Mary White has done sterling work in the field of suicide prevention and awareness and has also proved a great champion of the elderly in society.
Fine Gael’s Paul Coghlan has a sharp business brain, but this year, he was to the forefront in pressing the case of Killarney’s jarveys and their long-running horse nappy row. Honourable mention in this regard must also go to Paul’s party colleague in the Dáil, the canny Tom Sheahan.
Jerry Buttimer, also FG, still enlivens the chamber with his irreverent interruptions but he’s been a more thoughtful and insightful presence of late.
But the winner has to be Eoghan Harris. Senator Harris is a sparkling speaker, who either enthralls his audience or gets right up their noses. He’s a great man for starting a fight. Since he decided to abandon his Independent status and join Joe O’Toole’s Technical Group – he said he did it to annoy the Labour Party by keeping them down in the speaking order – he’s struck up a most entertaining double act with David Norris. One would almost say that they are already like an old married couple, except that everybody knows Eoghan’s heart really belongs to Fintan O’Toole.
No Awards are Complete Without an Award for Bertie
Goes to the former taoiseach for the selfless way he carried (for a fee) the gospel of the Celtic Tiger to third world countries anxious to learn the secret of Ireland’s success. There is a dead heat in the Best Bertism Category between the man himself and a glum observer at the election counts which saw de udder brudder Maurice Ahern fail to win a seat in the Dublin Central constituency or on the the Dublin City Council.
“It’s the end of the Ahern dysentery” he sniffed.
As for Bertie, at the showbiz style launch of his autobiography, he quoted an Oscar winning actor with the words “a famous American author, Synder Pottyer said . . .”
The Brave Little Soldiers Award
This goes to the judges of Ireland who are battling with “constitutional inhibitions”, explained a sympathetic Taoiseach to the Dáil when asked why the beaks were finding it so difficult to come up with some way of paying their fair share of the public service pension levy, like the ordinary folk. Most have now paid up.
“Oooooh-go-homa!“Award for the Most Unsuccessful Reworking of a Rogers and Hammerstein Song
Still with their Lordships, this award goes to Supreme Court judge Adrian Hardiman, who launched an astonishing broadside at journalists who cover the courts, bizarrely referring to them as “cowgirls” and reducing one of them to tears. The cowgirl hacks should be friends with the farmer lawyers, appeared to be the gist of his argument at a media awards ceremony in the Law Society.
The Most Promising Name of the Year Award
Both Bertie Ahern and John Bruton were after the job of EU president, but the gig fell to the wonderfully monikered Herman Van Rompuy, leading to loud cheers in newsrooms around the English speaking world. Herman, naturally, was immediately renamed Mr. Van Rompuy Pumpuy.
Book of the Year
A huge array of great books were published this year. Most examine why the nation is in a state of chassis, how we got there and who should carry the can. It will come as scant consolation to our rulers in Leinster House to know that the Irish public has a burning interest in politics and public affairs and is snapping up the work of writers exploring the genesis of our current crisis and the various people who played their part in it. The results of all this reading may well have its denouement at the next election. Then there are the autobiographies and biographies — Bertie’s buke is a terrific read. But as there can only be one winner it would have to be Jim Downey’s excellent memoir In My Time – Inside Irish Politics and Society. It’s a terrificly entertaining read from the elegant pen of a dyed-in-the-wool journalist, tracking the changes in Irish society over the last 50 years or so in tandem with a ripping yarn of fear and loathing on the newsroom floor of The Irish Times.
Wheelie Bin Award for Best Conspiracy Theorist
It could have gone to either Fine Gael or the Labour Party. They both got carried away as details of the Anglo Irish Bank Ten were revealed, dropping heavy hints that some of these big money merchants had connections with persons unnamed at government level. Nothing came of it. But the winner is Declan Ganley of Libertas, who was as unsuccessful in his tilt at a seat in the European Parliament as was the Libertas bid to become a force in European politics. Ganley’s presence at the count for Ireland North West descended into farce when he maintained that a large portion of his votes had been removed in a wheelie bin. After a recount, he emerged with even less votes.
Know your Place Award
Socialist Joe Higgins, victorious in the European elections in June. After his triumph, the new MEP for Dublin was feted in his native Kerry with a parade through the village of Garraí na dTur and a hooley in O’Sullivan’s bar. Just in case there was a danger Joe’s head might get turned by Jackeens of Dublin and the fleshpots of Europe, he was reminded of the facts of life in front of a cheering west Kerry crowd: “You may be representing Dublin in the EU, but you are first and foremost a Lispole Man.” This is true, but when the general election rolls around, MEP Joe will click his little red shoes together and chant “there’s no place like the Dáil”, hopefully to make a return to the bosom of Kildare Street.
People’s Princess Award
George Lee, ex-RTÉ, Fine Gael TD. “It looks like he’ll be assumed into heaven before noon,” remarked Pat Rabbitte when the boxes were opened in the byelection count. As was widely predicted, George won by a landslide. “I am now unconstrained by RTÉ!” cried the new deputy as he made his triumphant entrance into the RDS. Now, he is merely constrained by membership of Fine Gael’s crowded economic chorus, a top heavy unit of ambitious talking heads under the unassailable leadership of Richard Bruton and his able lieutenant Kieran O’Donnell, along with the likes of Simon Coveney, Leo Varadkar . . .
Sea the Stars Award for Poleaxed Politicians who have given Outstanding Service to the Horse Racing Industry
John O’Donoghue
Thierry Henry Award for Handler of the Year
Drawn from a limited field. The Government’s aversion to the media is enthusiastically shared by many of its advisers, who don’t seem to have learned that while they might not like journalists they shouldn’t let it show. At the Fianna Fáil Ardfheis, party strategists welcomed the media with the sort of enthusiasm usually reserved by airport security for potential suicide bombers. There are exceptions – the unflappable and pragmatic Richard Moore, who currently toils with Dermot Ahern and the laconic John Downing, assistant government press secretary who is such a great Greenkeeper that maybe he should be sent to sort out Portmarnock Golf Club when his stint with John Gormley and Co ends. But the winner has to be Cathy Herbert, the very low-key adviser to Brian Lenihan. Cathy, a former RTÉ correspondent, is always in the background keeping a watchful eye on her ambitious charge, who, we suspect, could be quite a handful if not properly minded. She can file 2009 under “work well done”.
The ‘Oh Do! Let’s Have Another Ardfheis Award’
To the Green Party who had four national conferences in 2009 while other parties muddled along with the usual one. The One G or Two Award also goes to The Green Party, which secured a ban on stag (one g) hunting from 2010 – but then switched the hunt to Leinster House when Paul Gogarty lanched a shockingly profane Dáil attack on Emmet Stagg (two gs). GoGo bags The Bride at every Wedding and Corpse at Every Wake Award for his discreet resignation – it made all the papers – as Green Party education spokesman at the party’s conference in Wexford last March.
Survivor of the Year
It could be Mary Harney, who soldiers on in the Department of Health, clinging on to her ministry even though her party no longer exists. But that award has to go to Brian Cowen, for obvious reasons.