GO MOTORING:THE BIG question on everyones lips is "will the Beetle make it?" We hope so. Neither of us knows a thing about cars, so as the tyres of our 1978 vintage blood-red VW Beetle touch French Tarmac for the first time, there is a frisson of excitement in expectation of travelling to new places in a quirky old car.
Irish Ferries’ Oscar Wilde recedes in the rear-view mirror after a relaxing crossing, and soon we are motoring through the Norman countryside, the rolling rain clouds seemingly having followed us all the way from Ireland.
Quickly, the Beetle takes on water from some unknown hole in the floor and we start to question the practicality of our endeavour.
A quick bail-out of the Beetle and we pull into Ste Mere Eglise, the village made famous in the D-Day landings, and where a statue of a US paratrooper still hangs from the church spire.
As we munch on a delicious tarte au fraisefrom the local boulangerie, we get our first approving look at the Beetle from a portly old Frenchman: " Monsieur, c'est une tres belle voiture, eh?"
Our first few days are spent staying in Chez Geoff, a beautiful French townhouse owned by relations in the tiny village of St Mars la Futaie on the Normandy/Brittany border. The lush countryside and small villages surrounding the bastille- town of Fougeres are perfect for exploring by bike and for drives to the impressive Mont St Michel, the Normandy beaches and its evocative cemeteries.
Then it’s off to Ile d’Yeu, a small island off the Atlantic coast between Nantes and La Rochelle. A fast passenger ferry takes you into this gem, little-known outside of France. The intricate maze of white-washed buildings and terracotta tiles gives the island an intense Mediterranean feel only added to by the sun-weathered locals who speak disdainfully of “le Continent” while sipping pastis and watching the fishing boats.
We stay with a family friend, Parisen Philippe, who tells us over a wonderful meal of galettes, how he is still considered a blow-in after 30 years on the island.
If you’re staying here on the cheap, the best option is the municipal campsite which is well located next to the main town, Port-Joinville. The island is so small you’re best to embrace the laid-back way of life and use a bike to get around.
In the high months Ile d’Yeu swells with Parisiens who come for the island atmosphere and sandy beaches, so booking ahead is advised, and renting a house can be pricey.
An excellent lunch before our ferry and we’re off again on the backroads towards Ardin, an hour north-west of La Rochelle.
If you’re driving in a car like the Beetle that shouldn’t really go above 90 kph, there’s not much point in taking the toll roads we reason. We’re right. The French regional roads are in great condition and allow us to bounce through villages that we’d miss on the autoroutes, without slowing us down too much either.
Going through the towns allows us to buy petrol in the cheaper supermarkets, as the smaller garages can be extortionate. Taking the back roads also lets us savour the small shifts in flora, fauna and architecture from village to village as we cross into the agricultural heartland of France.
We spend two great days in the Deux Sevres region, among immaculately maintained farms and villages where every household has its own vegetable patch before the wheat fields roll away to form a blue-gold horizon.
Then it’s back into the Beetle for the martyred village of Oradour sur Glane, outside Limoges. The village’s burnt-out buildings and rusting cars have been left exactly as they were when German soldiers carried out a brutal retributive attack on the entire population on June 10th, 1944. An excellent audio visual museum nearby vividly illustrates the events leading up to the massacre.
After the shocking sites of Oradour, the wheat fields give way to forested hills and then mountains as we push on into the Central Massif. Pine trees tower over us as we wind our way upwards towards Fouillat, a tiny, remote hamlet an hour south-west of Clermont Ferrand.
If you’re looking to get away from it all in an unknown and often overlooked part of France, then this rural idyll is a great choice.
We stay with Dutch friends in a beautifully restored farmhouse, but there is an excellent, secluded gite with amazing views just across the fields.
A week in the Auvergne is just what we need after all the driving. There’s so much to do in this area that it makes an excellent place for a family summer holiday, especially as there is a lakeside beach at the impressive Chateau du Val nearby.
And you need a beach here; when the sun’s out temperatures can soar into the 30s.
There’s also hiking at the spectacular Puy de Sancy, day trips to pretty towns such as Besse and cheese-tasting galore to be had.
Nursing our typically sunburnt Irish backs, we tentatively lower ourselves into the Beetle: our next destination the unofficial capital of the Burgundy wine region. Beaune, just south of Dijon, is an excellent place for a romantic break.
Elegant and typically French, restaurants spill out onto the small streets and squares and around every corner is another little reminder of why French towns can be so enthralling to visit.
Surrounding the town is the Route des Grand Crus, a national road that winds its way through the Pinot Noir vineyards that hug the hills and where you can stop and taste local wines.
In Beaune itself, there’s excellent tours of the cellars, involving tasting 15 reds and whites in a medieval candlelit setting, and plenty of cheap boxes of wine to be tasted and bought from local suppliers. They recommended wine tasting in the morning when the palate is fresh, but just be careful about getting back into the car too soon.
A night in a cheap hotel in Beaune, and we’re off again towards solemn Verdun to see its first World War battlefields and cemeteries.
We drift though the shell-cratered forests and the symmetrical rows of 15,000 crosses: wild poppies the only sign of life in this land of the dead.
France is rich in military history sites, and over the course of our trip we gain an impression of just how much blood has been shed on its soil over the years. The enduring feeling we take away from the Verdun graves and the Sacred Way is “for what?”
To lift our spirits, we decide our last stop will be Épernay, the Champagne region’s capital and another stylish and chic town where the grape is the source of the town’s obvious wealth.
Driving up the Avenue du Champagne is a sight to behold, and passing the royally decorated famous and not-so-famous Maisons du Champagne on either side leave a frisson of excitement in we mere proles.
An must is the Moët et Chandon tour. It is awe-inspiring, not only in terms of scale (they have 18 miles of underground caves chock full of champers) but also because we learn the process by which the bubbly stuff comes about.
Needles to say, we emerge having been shaped as intended, as champagne connoisseurs, who will now only accept the most expensive vintages. “Leave the rest for the riff-raff,” is the cry. If only.
Épernay's a great way to bring our trip to a close, a little luxury to end on a high. There's excellent champenoisecuisine to be discovered and cool champagne bars where we taste less well-known varieties.
While sipping from a flute we kick back, relax, and think of all the new places the old Beetle has taken us.
Go there
Patrick and Rita travelled with Irish Ferries (irishferries.com) on the Rosslare to Cherbourg sailing. A June single fare for two adults, a car and an ensuite two-star, three-berth cabin cost €224.
The Ile D’Yeu ferry leaves from Fromentiers (compagnie-yeu-continent.fr) and costs €34pp return. In summer book ahead.
Stay
La Maison DErnestine gite in Fouillat, 0033-47390907 or gites-de-france-puydedome.co.uk. Sleeps eight, has great views, mod cons and games room with table tennis and more. From €595 a week
Hotel Le Foch, 24 Bd Marechal Foch, Beaune, 0033- 380240565 or hotelbeaune-lefoch.fr. Near the centre, but its traditional bar-cum-reception is worth it alone and there is another cool bar beside it. Doubles from €46.
Hotel Les Berceaux, 13 Rue Des Berceaux, Épernay, 0033-326552884 or lesberceaux.com. Decent three-star with a Michelin-starred restaurant. Doubles are from €90.
Eat
L’Artimon, Place de la Norvège, Port-Joinville, Ile dYeu, 0033 -228112243 or ile-yeu.fr.
Watch the fishing boats from under a parasol while eating seafood brochettes or the plat du jour with the locals. Menus €11-€21.
La Cave à Champagne, 16 Rue Gambetta, Épernay, 0033-326555070 or la-cave-a-champagne.com. Probably the best meal we had: try the Menu Gourmand, and go for the St Jacques scallops in Champagne to start. Menus €18-€43.
There’s a funky champagne bar two doors down, C Comme Champagne, c-comme.fr
Sip
Even if you don’t know much about wines, you’ll learn a bit from the sommeliers at a tasting in Marché aux Vins, 2 Rue Nicolas Rolin, Beaune, marcheauxvins.com and then do the Route des Grand Crus to find your favourite Burgundys.
In Épernay, the Moët & Chandon tour (moet.com, €15-€28 depending on how many flutes you try) is a little brash but interesting and generally rewarding.