The bicentenary of Munich's Oktoberfest rolls around later this month and the Bavarian belief in an old-fashioned good time remains as unshakeable as ever, writes DEREK SCALLY
MUNICH'S WORLD famous Oktoberfest celebrates its 200th anniversary this year, a month-long celebration that is not just about the 6.5 million litres of beer that will be downed in the coming weeks, but the unshakeable Bavarian belief in an old-fashioned good time.
This is something that takes a while to sink in, particularly for first-time visitors to the Wiesn (locals never call it Oktoberfest) and then only with the able assistance of more experienced hands.
What we now know as the Oktoberfest is held on a massive festival meadow in central Munich where Crown Prince Ludwig married Princess Therese in 1810. They invited the citizens of Munich to the reception and, apart from a few short breaks for war and disease, the party goes on.
Today it is a massive endeavour, spread out over 14 tents with each as daunting as the last. Our first stop is the Armbrustschützen, a tent as large as a cathedral, where the pews are beer benches and the choir is a brass band. When we arrive, the band is giving its oompah repertoire a rest and is instead jiving its way through
Little Brown Jug, the air is sticky with the aroma of roast meat and the lure of a long, liquid evening.
Standing on the benches are cheering revellers, thousands and thousands of them. Most of the men wear smart lederhosen (you have to see it to believe it), the ladies are turned out in dirndls, the only dress in the world that flatters every wearer.
Delving stone-cold sober into all this for the first time summons up a sinking feeling – "this can't possibly work". In those first few minutes the festival seems very much like the cliched idea of a good time in Germany. The tents are filled with signs – "Don't Stop Here" in the aisles – the cavernous kitchen is run like a boot camp and the tables are reserved months in advance on the internet. Surely this is a nightmare of premeditated, state-controlled fun times? "Ve have vays of making you drink!"
One hour later, things are looking up. Friends sing the first of many lusty rounds of Ein
Prosit der Gemütlichkeit, the Wiesn anthem, and we clunk our chunky one litre Maß (Mass) beer glasses. "Once you get used to a
Maßin your hand," remarks my suave Wiesn guardian angel, "every other beer glass feels like something from a children's birthday party."
The second litre of beer brings the first rays of enlightenment. Yes, the Wiesn is a model of Teutonic efficiency, but is there any other way to organise a festival on this scale – particularly if you hope to get in more than one beer an evening?
My mind drifts back to large scale events in Ireland: nightmarish, "never again" St Patrick's Day nights out in Dublin; traffic chaos after every event ever held at Slane Castle; Twink ventilating on the radio after the Barbra Streisand concert from hell. Would Irish-style organisation be any better here? Hell no. Here on the Wiesn, the organisation is so flawless – in particular thanks to the heroic staff – that it becomes invisible after a while.
By the third
Maßa good time is being had by all, even the anxious Irish visitor. As darkness falls we go for a stroll through the festival grounds to watch how the rest of the Wiesn works. It's a festival of many levels. The first, alcohol-free level, is the free-entry fairground where families enjoy roller coasters and young couples buy gingerbread hearts adorned with delightfully soppy messages in frosting.
The next reality can be found in the largest tents, where tourists and their money are easily parted. Over one, a mechanical lion above the entrance knocks back a beer while braying the brand.
Anyone looking for some cheap entertainment is advised to visit the lost and found tent where last year's lost items included a toaster, a pair of dentures and a small dog.
We reach our last Wiesn level late at night at the VIP enclosure that is the tent by the name of Käfer. Inside the tent is a maze of narrow corridors, wooden beams and packed booths. The men seem to be mostly tanned heirs with greased-back hair. The women are from the young and busty school, complete with steely gazes of determination to get one of these men to the altar within the year. It's
How to Marry a Munich Millionairerun on beer instead of champagne.
"To get in here," my Wiesn spy shouts over the frantic music, "you need connections and money. The rest follows." The Wiesn spy has supplied the connections and I have watched my pocket of cash – no cards here – dwindle rapidly as the night wears on. I'm not sure I want to know what follows. The music gets louder, the dancing more frantic and, depending on your preferences or your blood-alcohol level, this is either in-crowd heaven or an outer, leather-clad ring of hell.
Either way, the Oktoberfest on its 200th birthday is in rude, wonderful health.
Getting there
Aer Lingus (aerlingus.com) flies to Franz J Strauss airport in Munich and Ryanair (ryanair.com) flies to Memmingen
Where to eat, where to stay and what to do
5 places to eat
The Wiesn tents: after ordering a halbes hendl (half a roast chicken) or grill platter – containing everything from wild boar to roast duck – you may never eat again.
Restaurant Lenz, Pettenkoferstrasse 48. Tel: 00-49-89- 55239771, speiselokal-lenz.de. Good Bavarian food if you fancy getting away from the Wiesn but want to stay close to the action.
Monsiuer Hu, Dreimühlenstr 11. Tel: 00-49-89-45217272 or visit monsieurhu.de. A trendy Vietnamese restaurant to cleanse your palate entirely of beer and wild boar. Starters €4, mains €12-€14. Book in advance.
Restaurant Dallmayr, Dienerstr 14-15. Tel: 00-49-89-2135-100 or dallmayr.de. Two Michelin stars and Munich’s most famous delicatessen downstairs if you’re still hungry afterwards.
Restaurant Käfer, Prinzregentenstr 73. Tel: 00-49-89-4168247 or visit feinkost-kaefer.de. If you don’t make it into the Käfer tent, try a meal in the original restaurant that has been feeding Munich’s in-crowd for decades.
5 places to stay
The golden rule in Wiesn season is to book well in advance and be prepared for “special” rates.
Hotel Advokat, Baaderstrasse 1. Tel: 00-49-89-216310 or visit hotel-advokat.de. Uninspiring exterior but beautifully renovated small hotel inside. Friendly staff and a fantastic breakfast.
The Charles, Sophienstr 28. Tel: 00-49-89-5445550 or visit charleshotel.de. Newish, stylish hotel from Rocco Forte direct at the old Botanic gardens and near Königsplatz.
Sofitel Munich Bayerpost, Bayerstrasse 12. Tel: 00-49-89-599480 or sofitel.com. Elegant and refined and near the main train station, this hotel is in a landmark building with stunning rooms and banqueting hall.
The Tent, In den Kirschen 30. Tel: 00-49-89-1414300 or the-tent.com. Munich’s cheapest sleep, just €7.50 in a communal tent including foam mat and blankets. Bed in the “Bed Tent” from €10.50.
Creatif Hotel Elephant, Lämmerstrasse 6. Tel: 00-49-89-555785 or visit creatif-hotel-elephant.com. An unusual, Wiesn-friendly place to stay with an artistic, eco-friendly twist.
Do
ORDER a table online, or go early (until 4pm) and not at weekends.
BRING cash and tip generously (€10 for an €8.60 one-litre beer).
MAKE a small concession to Wiesn fashion (a jacket, a plaid shirt).
Don’t
WEAR a football jersey or a cut-price Wiesn outfit from the likes of C&A, made in China.
BEHAVE how the locals expect the Irish/Brits to behave (slobbish stags and slutty hens).
GREET women with your eyes on their cleavage just because they’re wearing a busty dirndl.
Shopping tip
If you’re determined to go the Wiesn in full gear, ignore the cheap CA outfits and go instead to Trachten Angermeier, Rosental 10. Tel: 00-49-89-23000199 or visit trachten-angermaier.de.