Blow Up The Liffey Bridges!


Grand Canal Theatre

So begins a fictitious war between rival taxi companies, although in a presumably unconscious tribute, the more evil company is a genuine Dublin franchise, right down to the logo and telephone number (any sponsorship deal must have been a secondary consideration).

In the play, it is managed by an unmodulated ice queen with the catchphrase, “In the game of life, nobody plays Molly Carroll.” That’s sound casting advice, but the part goes to reality TV survivor, Vogue Williams, who “has never looked back since appearing on Fade Street” and who can blame her?

Her opponents are the Northside Fagans, led by a supposedly chip-obsessed grotesque in the bizarrely accented, trim form of Cora Fenton (I’m all for low humour, but the budget should have stretched to a fat suit). The Fagans form an alliance with three unemployed scouse builders (Kent Riley, Alan Stocks and Alexander Newland) who hatch a plan to blow up the Liffey bridges (actually they brick them up) causing traffic chaos rivalled only by the Queen’s visit.

Now, even without grating role call references to Dublin celebrities and reworded pop songs, this is several shades of awful.

Pub-grade comedy might work in an intimate setting, but director Tom Kibbe is at a loss in the gargantuan Grand Canal Theatre, where only Emmet Kirwan and Jane McGrath invest appropriate energy. Asking an audience familiar with Ross O’Carroll Kelly or plausible celebrity impersonations to accept such a dispiritingly cheap alternative is a bridge too far.

Ends tomorrow