ADVICE: Aoife Coonaghanswers your career questions

Moving on from 'survivor's guilt'

Dear Aoife

I've just been through the worst period of my working life, and I've made a complete mess of it, it seems. A year ago, all the country managers were summoned to our international headquarters and then told we each had to cut 25 per cent of payroll. We could choose how we did it, subject to general parameters. There was a budget for pay-offs, and quite a generous one at that, but any manager who tried to fight the cutbacks could pack his or her bag there and then. I flew back to Ireland next morning and broke the bad news. They weren't expecting it and this company has always had a benign "one big family" feeling to it.

I tried to spread the pain, cutting within departments as much as possible and preserving the basic structure of what is essentially a distribution business, sourcing products from sister companies across the globe. I decided not to hide away while the process of identifying the job losers took place. I knew I had to be able to look people in the eye and listen to them as they told me how devastated they were, and how long-cherished plans were being binned.

Some were very personal and, in a few instances, hurtful. But there's no answer to: "It's all very well for you, you aren't getting the push after 30 years."

Once the goodbyes were said, I thought things might return to something like normal and those who remained would be happy they had been spared.But the mood has changed. People are not happy.

Obviously, they're more stretched since we're trying to achieve the same output with fewer resources. But that alone isn't enough to explain the gloom. Now, those who held on to their jobs are thinking about the package they could have taken and wondering if maybe they should have gone. And the way I feel now, I'm wondering the same thing. How do I get us back to where we were?

Dear Pat

There are a number of factors at work here. Let's take the last first. You may have heard of "survivor's guilt" where those who escape an accident in which others perished suffer a form of sympathetic depression. It affects the survivors of redundancy programmes too, and some of your staff may have it.

From your letter, you handled a difficult task well. You made yourself available and didn't hide away. You took personal responsibility, even though the decision was out of your control.

But the job is not yet finished. And the one error in your thinking going into this was the belief that, when the goodbyes had been said, things could "get back to normal".

They won't, or at least not the "normal" you knew before the change. You now have a brand-new team and you should treat them as such. You can't - and they can't - spend time wishing things could be "just like they were before". You have all been through a difficult time and it is natural that this would be followed by the equivalent of a "grieving" process. But now, you need to start afresh with your new team.

One suggestion is to draw a line in the sand. You and your team have a night out to celebrate the team that was - like an Irish "wake". And once the wake is over and you have chatted about the good old days, move on.

Now, talk to your team about the future. Outline the challenges facing the organisation, and the main targets and priorities. Invite them to join with the management team in coming up with plans to move forward. In my experience, once there are clear goals and the staff have a focus, they will be more willing to make recommendations on the actions needed to achieve them.

They will also take their cue from you. Staff are highly attuned to the moods of their managers; show them you have shaken the gloom and are re-engaged. That does not mean you are dismissing those who have gone, but you cannot mourn them indefinitely and your responsibility now is to the team you have.

Don't get mad, get even better prospects

Dear Aoife

I can hardly write this letter. I'm hopping mad. I've worked for a company for almost 30 years. I joined as a clerk in the wages office, got my accountancy qualification and ran the accounts function for 10 years, before becoming sales director and presiding over the largest increase in sales the company has ever achieved. I also did an MBA and have been deputy managing director for the past three years, with a fire-fighting brief to sort out problems in the production and distribution processes.

When the managing director was off sick last year, I sat in for him for six months. I'm the "go to guy" . When the wheels come off I sort the problem out, without fuss and without getting people's backs up. I've never been one for the theatrical approach. I know the people, know the problems. Fix it and move on is my motto.

About three weeks ago, I got a feeling I was out of the loop. I just stopped getting "copied in" on stuff. Then the finance director - an old friend, I thought - stopped talking when I went into the managing director's office unannounced. The monthly golf outing for senior people got cancelled at no notice. Yesterday the managing director called me into his office. He looked very serious and explained that due to problems affecting the parent company in the UK, he had no option but to make heavy staff cuts. Fool that I am, I told him he would have my full support in pushing the redundancy programme through. He looked at me in a way I had never seen before."You want me to go?" I said, scarcely believing I was saying it.

"I'm sorry, Sean," was all he could say.

I'm not the only person, but the others are voluntary. I'm gutted, I've put a lifetime's work into this business. It's almost family to me. I've only seven years to go to retirement. I'm also very, very angry. The managing director owes his position to my support and loyalty, and this is no way to repay me.

Dear Sean

I'm sorry first of all for what's happened to you. And I'm sure that, being a practical man, you can also see both sides of the story; you know the figures, you know the company is over-staffed, that jobs must go, and that they can't all be on the shop floor. Clearly, the company has decided in hard times they will have to do without a Mr Fixit.

It might be tempting to go into rant/sulk mode, but I don't think you are that sort of person. Instead explore the possibilities of the situation. The managing director will want you to go without fuss. See what help he is prepared to offer to smooth your path. There's out-placement counselling - professional help and coaching for all stages of career change, from evaluating your current situation from a personal and a career perspective, through to getting your CV up to speed and job interview preparation. Now is the time to take stock and to reflect objectively with the assistance of a professional. By considering your career options and writing new career goals before you jump into sending out your CV, you'll be prepared to succeed in your chosen path.

Look instead at what you have. An excellent track record, proven management, accounting and sales skills. I know lots of businesses that need people with that portfolio of skills. I can see you not with one job but with a series of consultancies, because that is much of what you have, in effect, being providing within your job up to now.

Only this time you get to choose. And if you handle your exit strategy well, some of the consultancy work may well be for the old firm. An increasing number of my clients find they are offered project work by the companies they previously worked for, because they understand the company history and culture, and the challenges that need to be addressed.

You may not be thinking like this just at the moment. So, a few words of advice. Be hopping mad - you're entitled to it. But put a time limit on it. Then stop. And move on with the rest of what could be an exciting new start. I think it was Truman Capote who said: "The next best thing is very often the best thing."

AOIFE COONAGH is head of the career development unit at Carr Communications. The case histories published are true, but details have been changed to avoid identifying individuals and companies. If you have a problem you would like to see featured, or wish to comment, e-mail askaoife@irish-times.ie