Sonia O'Sullivan spoke yesterday of a new philosophy on the eve of her biggest ordeal of the year in the World Cross Country championship at Marrakesh this afternoon.
The athlete who has played on the emotions of an entire nation at regular intervals in the last eight years has, on the face of it, come to terms with the deep distress of the 1996 Olympic Games in Atlanta.
Not until she achieves the fulfilment of championship success can her rehabilitation be said to be complete, however, and to that extent, this latest assignment, under a hot midday sun in Morocco, threatens to be a pivotal one for her career.
"In the sense that I need a big race win to convince the doubting Thomases it's an important day for me, but the real pressure now comes from within rather from outside," she said.
"In the past I worried about my next race and how people might react if I lost. That's now over and the only thing that matters is that I'm happy with myself and feel comfortable with what I'm doing.
"I do, of course, want to make people happy by winning. But I worry less these days about the consequences of things going wrong. People have seen the best of me and the worst of me. They've seen every side of it and now the only thing that really matters to me is how I feel after the race."
To win today in temperatures which are expected to have climbed into the mid nineties by the time the race starts (half an hour later than scheduled, at 12.40 p.m. Irish time) O'Sullivan will be required to pass a huge test of character.
Not everybody in this deeply fundementalist land is enamoured, it seems, of the propriety of women running in modern athletics gear. There have been dark mutterings hinting at protests during today's races, staged close to the city centre, but in spite of some disgraceful scenes in Morocco last year when women were stoned and spat upon while watching a men's race, the IAAF say it's not a threat which should trouble us unduly.
The bigger worries for the Irish woman, one of a handful of elite athletes whom the International Amateur Athletics Federation chose to address an international press audience at a plush city centre hotel yesterday, will almost certainly emanate from inside the roped off area.
Instead of the scheduled 8,000 metres, competitors will now have to run 400 metres less. According to O'Sullivan that's an important psychological benefit. The fact remains, however, that it is still way outside her normal range in track races of 800 to 5,000 metres. And while she herself remains upbeat, it remains to be seen how she handles the extra distance.
The weather may prove to be another crucial factor. The sun has been burning relentlessly out of azure skies since the overseas athletes arrived here on Wednesday and the fear is that it could now burn off the title aspirations of those who take undue risks in the running of the race.
A year ago at Turin, O'Sullivan gambled on going out fast and paid the penalty. Now, she aspires to run more evenly in the hope that she can save enough strength to bring her superior speed into play at the finish.
"Twelve months ago, I probably panicked and tried to get away too quickly. Now I feel I can take it a bit handier at the start and still avoid getting caught up in the traffic. The less racing I have to do in the middle stages the better. The plan is to coast along in contact with the leaders and then, hopefully, turn it on over the last 1,000 metres."
Depending on how she fares today, she may report back to the course tomorrow for the shorter of the two women's championships, over 4,800 metres, but that is a scenario she prefers not to dwell on at this stage. Everything must be focused on doing well today when she seeks to succeed where Catherina McKiernan failed on four agonising occasions and become the first Irish athlete to win this title.
She will be encouraged in that objective by the absence of the brilliant Ethiopian, Derartu Tulu, a former Olympic 10,000 metres champion and a winner of this title twice in the last three years, who is out with an injury.
Her compatriot, Gete Wami, who won at Cape Town in 1996, is in the field, however, and to this obvious threat must be added the emerging talent of the young Kenyan, Jackline Maranga, who is very much the athlete in form after winning three world cross races this season.
Britain's Paula Ratcliffe, second to Tulu in Turin last March, has apparently recovered from the illness which struck in mid season and there will also be wary eyes for two other members of the Kenyan team, Sally Barsosio and Lydia Cheromei.
Valerie Vaughan, Maureen Harrington, Teresa Duffy and Anne Keenan Buckey complete the Irish team, but quite clearly O'Sullivan's performance, coming on the back of a successful Australian tour, will determine the mood of the squad gong into the second day.
The hope will be that O'Sullivan can rediscover the old magic and by running authoritatively as well as sensibly, can deliver the irrefutable evidence that she has distanced herself from the trauma of Atlanta and, to a lesser extent, the disappointment of the World Championships in Athens last summer.
Seamus Power leads the Irish challenge in the men's championship, in which the brilliant Kenyan Paul Tergat, in his attempt to take the title for a fourth consecutive year, must legislate for the running machine that is Daniel Koeman.
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