Rangers' fans all heart: With Uefa refusing to budge on their insistence that Liverpool will not compete in the Champions League next season, we were touched by the offer made to the club by some Scottish supporters yesterday - they have even set up an online petition, one that goes something like this:
"To UEFA, SPL, THE FA "We (the undersigned), in a gesture of goodwill and as a tribute to the 2004/2005 European Champions Liverpool FC, would like UEFA, the SPL and the English FA to consider a donation of Scotland's second Champions League position to the aforementioned club, thereby allowing the holders of the Champions League entry into the qualifiers and making the tournament all that more special. Sincerely, etc."
PS We should add that Scotland's second Champions League position belongs to Celtic. And the petition was organised by Rangers' fans.
Quotes of the day: "Amazing, astounding, awe-inspiring, breathtaking, extraordinary, hair-raising, heart-stirring, magnificent, marvellous, miraculous, moving, overwhelming spectacular, spine-tingling, striking, stunning, stupefying, stupendous, wonderful." - Liverpool's official website responds in a rather relaxed manner to Wednesday night's events.
"At half-time I read all the texts from my Man Utd-supporting mates. After the penalty shoot-out I replied to them." - "Strim", in another text to BBC Online.
"The best comback since Bobby Ewing in the shower." - "Ryan W", in a text to BBC Online.
"I heard on Radio City this morning about a Liverpool fan who left the stadium at half-time yesterday and had a 40-minute taxi ride back to his hotel. He went to the bar and asked the barman the score, was more than a bit gutted when he heard it was 3-3 and almost full time. Poor sod." - As spotted on a Liverpool messageboard.
"Marco Polo, Sandro Botticelli, Tintoretto, Rembrandt Bugatti, Frankie Dettori, Umberto Eco, Mario Andretti, Luciano Pavarotti - your boys took a hell of a beating." - "Eddy", in another text to BBC Online.
Odds-on you'll lose: Yarns of this nature inevitably do the rounds after nights like Wednesday, but the source for this one is none other than Angus Loughran, aka Statto (of Fantasy Football fame) and a professional gambler. Sitting comfortably? It's half-time on Wednesday night, it's AC Milan 3, Liverpool 0. A (mercifully) unnamed individual checks out the latest odds on the game: Milan are 50 to 1 on to win. So . . . he puts £150,000 on the Italians, a bet that, if successful, would yield him . . . £3,000. Uh oh.
The Milan post mortem: "It is very strange and hard to explain." - Paolo Maldini
"I don't know what happened." - Clarence Seedorf
"Congratulations to Liverpool but I don't understand what happened." - Hernan Crespo
"I don't know how we lost . . . all those chances, all those saves." - Andriy Shevchenko
"I don't think you can find a logical explanation for those six minutes." - Carlo Ancelotti
Lord works in mysterious ... Spotted on a Manchester United website on Wednesday afternoon: "Dear Lord, It's me again . . I'd like to broach a sensitive subject with you. You have been a little harsh recently. Not that I'm criticising - no way! - but yes, life has been a bit tough on the football front. I'm not one to whinge unnecessarily . . but I'm beginning to think that you have some dark plans for Manchester United fans.
"Playing turgid football I can handle, Lord. Not winning trophies is hard.the death of Manchester United FC stings a bit too, if I'm honest . . but I have one very simple thing to ask you now. One favour. You know what I'm asking. At 22:00 BST tomorrow evening, let Maldini be holding the European Cup. Don't let the permed forces of darkness get their grubby hands on the Grail. It would break me. Forever. Just one favour, for little old me. What do you say? Eh? Just give me a little sign to show that you're on the case." Oh well, there goes another believer.
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