April

DJ Carey decided to shelve his retirement plans. Warren Gatland asserted that Twickenham could be a positive experience. We noted that it was April 1st. Ireland finished the Five Nations losing 17-35. To console us, the French put 51 past the Welsh. Pat Whelan stepped down as Irish manager. Thank God for callow youth. Ireland's rugby teenagers took the World Championship after comprehensively beating the French. In Augusta, Mark O'Meara revealed shocking colour co-ordination by sporting a green jacket over an all-chocolate ensemble. Tiger Woods helped him into the jacket. Fuzzy Zoeller said nought. Earth Summit finished first at the Aintree national, Shannon won the AIL final and Offaly took their first NFL title, churning out a win over Derry.