Sir, – I hadn’t realised, until I read the letter from S Claus (November 21st) that either the North Pole is in Ireland, or that Mr Claus doesn’t know that the postage outside this country is 82 cent and not 55 cent. – Yours, etc,
Sir, – I was intrigued to read the letter from Santa Claus (November 21st). I’m sure it’s genuine, because we know how stringent your verification process is. Otherwise, someone with a suspicious nature might imagine that it was really from An Post, hoping to boost its revenues in these difficult times.
Fifty-five cents may not be a lot, but I recall that, when I was small, one could communicate with Santy for free. All you had to do was write your heart’s desire on a piece of paper, then throw it into the fire. The paper would burn up, and the charred remains would be sucked up the chimney by the draught.
By some mystical process which was beyond the understanding of a small child, the ashes would make their way to the man himself, who would be able to disentangle their message and, in the fullness of time, deliver the goods.
I know we all have to move with the times, but one thing puzzles me. If, as Santa says, Mrs Claus has a computer, why can the boys and girls not send their wish lists by e-mail? – Yours, etc,