History of Ireland in 100 Excuses

 

Sir, – 282. My bicycle chain had a puncture and my front tyre fell off! (Excuse to a teacher from a teenage boy late for school, circa 1960). – Yours, etc,

RAY HOGAN,

Ballyorney,

Enniskerry,

Co Wicklow.

Sir, – 283. Sorry, I can’t hear you, you’re breaking up. – Yours, etc,

UNA SIMMS,

Adelaide Street,

Dún Laoghaire,

Co Dublin.

Sir, – Regarding Frank McNally’s list (An Irishman’s Diary, February 9th and correspondents since) I would add the following excuse in the Socratic method. 284. “Says your aul’ one to my aul’ one, will ye come to the Waxies Dargle? And says my aul’ one to your aul’ one,

I haven’t got a farthing!”

– Yours, etc,

JOE MURRAY,

Beggars Bush Court,

Ballsbridge, Dublin 4.

A chara, – 285. Ní féidir liom Gaeilge a labhairt. – Is mise,

DARIUS BARTLETT,

College View,

Midleton,

Cork.

Sir, – 286. It was my fault. – Yours, etc,

TOM NEVILLE,

Leopardstown Avenue,

Blackrock,

Co Dublin.

Sir, – 287. The Bart Simpson Defence: “I didn’t do it. Nobody saw me do it. You can’t prove anything.” – Yours, etc,

CORMAC MEEHAN,

Bundoran, Co Donegal.