MAGPIE:THE COUNTRY may be broke and we may be ruled by the least competent bunch of shysters in the western world but hey, all is not lost.
The Irish accent has just been declared the sexiest in the world, coming top in a poll of 5,000 women worldwide. Italian came second, with Scottish third. Former favourite, the French accent only managed fourth, just ahead of the Australian accent.
A spokesman for OnePoll.com, which carried out the international survey, blamed French president Nicolas Sarkozy for the French accent’s fall from grace and accredited the success of the Irish lilt to Colin Farrell amongst others.
The study also found three-fifths of women admitted they have been seduced by someone purely because of their accent, while two-fifths said they would much rather sleep with a man who had a nice accent, compared to a harsh one.
The emigration option grows more attractive by the day . . .
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AND ON the subject of getting outta here, a company behind plans to open the first hotel in space says it is on target to accept its first paying guests in 2012 despite critics questioning the investment and time frame for the multibillion-dollar project.
The Barcelona-based architects of The Galactic Suite Space Resort (galacticsuite.com) say it will cost €3 million for a three-night stay at the hotel, with this price including an eight-week training course.
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THE VIRGIN Mary in the skies over Knock? And if so, why not Ringo Starr’s mug in a droplet of water on a lotus leaf?
Maybe, say a team researching water-repellent leaf behaviour at Duke University in North Carolina. According to James Dacey, a reporter for Physics World, online journal of the Institute of Physics in London, the Beatles' drummer "seems to reveal himself in the high-speed photo images of water-droplets being ejected from the leaf surface".
There is some argument over whether the image is actually of George Harrison, rather than Ringo. When battling the throat cancer that eventually killed him, Harrison was alleged to have offered that “Life is like a raindrop on a lotus leaf”.
Readers interested in apparitions will no doubt also have noticed that story late last month about the image of Jesus spotted on . . . the door of the men’s toilets in a Glasgow branch of Ikea.
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BUT WHEN it comes to virtual reality, this week’s bouquet is awarded, unanimously say the judges, to North Devon District Council for the conditions it has placed on Ilfracombe Rugby Club’s bonfire night celebrations this evening. Citing health and safety concerns (what else?) council officials have decreed, for the fourth year in a row, that the fire of the bonfire must be a . . . virtual fire – that is, a 16ft by 12ft screen, mounted on a scaffolding stand, on to which the club is permitted to project images of roaring flames.
The non-fire night will also involve giant heaters, lighting and a smoke machine to give the crowd the taste of a real bonfire night. Zoe Payne (31) was not entering into the spirit of it all. "If I want to watch TV I'll stay in and watch EastEnders," she sniffed. "It is health and safety nonsense." Amy Collins (26) agreed. "The whole point of Guy Fawkes night is to watch and smell a real bonfire." Council officials said that to have a real fire they would require five qualified fire marshals and metal barricades to keep the expected 2,000 people at a safe distance.
A spokesman said: “A Temporary Event Notice has been issued by North Devon Council for a virtual bonfire night at Ilfracombe Rugby Club. This allows the sale by retail of alcohol and the provision of regulated entertainment for this event at a cost of £21 to the organisers.
“If people are employed to provide a real bonfire or firework display then health and safety legislation will apply.”