ALL the carpet cleaners, the Gallaghers are back! Barely five months after a rock n roll swathe through the capital, those Oasis boys are headed for Cork next week, and the Leeside city won't know what hit it. Tales of drunkenness, brawling, lovers' tiffs and parental spats were all over the tabloids the last time the Manchester band came to Ireland, and no doubt there'll be plenty of equally unconfirmed reports from. Cork this time round.
We're all counting on Liam and. Noel Gallagher to be on their best bad behaviour, and we'll be very disappointed if there isn't at least one ruined carpet or angry fiancee at the end of it all.
Here's a selection of rumours and facts which have been flying around about Oasis in the week before their two sellout concerts at Pairc Ui Chaoimh on Wednesday and Thursday - you separate them yourself:
. During their visit to Cork, the band and its entourage will be staying in Mallow Castle, owned by affable American Michael McGinn, and will be travelling to and from the gig by whirly bird.
. Liam has been working out in a gym, so he can be a "fit bloke" for the band's gigs in Loch Lomond, Cork and Knebworth (does that mean he won't need to sit down onstage anymore?)
. Support at Cork is provided by The Prodigy and The Bootleg Beatles.
. MCD, promoters of the Cork gigs, have fire and safety clearance for 40,000 capacity each night, which means extra tickets are available - hey, where are ya going? I'm not finished yet!
. Fans in Cork will hear tracks from the band's soon to be recorded third album, including It's Getting Better, Mun and My Big Mouth.
. What's The Story? Morning Glory is 2-1 favourite to win the Mercury Music Prize.
. A recent survey in Britain has found Oasis to be the country's most popular hand of all time, ahead of The Beatles. The Fab Four, however, are still No 1 with the over 25 age group. Phew.