Tune in to your children at young age, conference told

A strong attachment to the mother or other primary care-giver is essential for the development of confident, secure children, …

A strong attachment to the mother or other primary care-giver is essential for the development of confident, secure children, according to a leading clinical psychologist.

"People often don't believe how important the first two years are in a child's life. But, this is when the neural foundations for life are set down," said Dr Kate Byrne, the co-founder of Attachment Parenting EU and a mother of seven children.

Dr Byrne was speaking on the science of attachment and attachment from toddlers to teenagers at a conference in Tralee, Co Kerry celebrating the 50th anniversary of the breastfeeding support organisation La Leche League (LLL).

She said attachment theory could answer a lot of our questions on parenting but they may not always be what we want to hear.

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"In modern western society, we hold the beliefs that we need to foster babies' independence, refraining from spoiling them and encouraging acceptable behaviour and sleep patterns. But by responding and tuning in to your children at a young age, you will get far more independent children," she said.

Dr Byrne explained how attachment theory, which was developed in the 1950s by English psychiatrist Dr John Bowlby and American psychologist Mary Ainsworth, has now been backed up by research in neurology, genetics, psychiatry and psychology.

"Studies have found that babies who are fed and kept clean but not shown love and empathic response fail to thrive," she said. "From late pregnancy until the second year of life, the human brain experiences a critical period of accelerated growth which requires not only sufficient nutrients but optimal interpersonal experiences for maximal maturation."

Anne Cleary, a lecturer in early childhood care and education at the Institute of Technology (IT) in Tralee, attended the lecture. "Attachment theory is just one of many parenting theories," she told The Irish Times. "Others suggest that leaving babies to cry helps build up their confidence and makes them more independent.

"However, I agree with Dr Byrne's point that you have to respond and be in tune with your children. Nowadays, children can be so isolated, spending time alone in their rooms and not communicating enough with family members."

Mary Fitzgibbon, a La Leche League tutor and teacher at the Department of Nursing and Healthcare Studies at IT Tralee, said that attachment theory is one of the principles of the La Leche League.

The conference, which was held at the Department of Nursing and Healthcare Studies at the IT in Tralee on Saturday, was attended by mothers who are currently breastfeeding their infants and those who started the Tralee branch of the LLL 30 years ago.

Sylvia Thompson

Sylvia Thompson

Sylvia Thompson, a contributor to The Irish Times, writes about health, heritage and the environment