As Mundy sang, "Mayday, Mayday, Can you read me, I think I'm about to fall.... I can hardly move, my bones are all freezed up."

The perfect synopsis of how I feel facing into this morning, panicked and nervous. My plan was to be sensible and go to bed at nine last night; I'd be surprised if I fell asleep before six this morning.

The first exam is always the worst and with a subject as broad as English it is so hard to gauge a result. At least by tomorrow, we'll be into a routine (ooh oh, that's definitely my father talking), but will we still be worrying about points we haven't even earned yet? I think so.

I really can't believe that this moment has actually arrived. Since September - of fifth year, of course - we have been working towards this day. All those Saturday mornings when I dragged myself out of bed, sacrificing lie-ins to view the world before noon, all because I had to study. All the sunny days spent with my head in the books (about three days in total). All the dedication that was needed to withstand the annual loud-lawnmower competition. Not to mention how every child in Dundalk seemed to descend upon my street to scream and moan and bang things.

Okay, so I'll admit I wasn't up until one o'clock but I was inside, and like Lear I was searching for that "patience, patience that I need" and asking the sweet heavens to "let me not be mad" as I planned how to gag the children and dismantle the lawnmowers. I think esters were the flavour of the day. However, the whole time I kept thinking "get into my head quotes and definitions, that derivation must make sense (on some planet), come on, fly into my mind not over it, help me get to Galway". (Yes, my preferred destination is NUI Galway - unless College of Life, Jamaica, really wants me.)

So I sit at breakfast, Dad reads the paper, Mam reassures me "you'll do fine" (those comforting words I cringe to hear). Then she hands me the Rescue Remedy. "Perfect as always, Mother."

Upstairs my sister sleeps contentedly; she might be up by the time I come home for lunch. Sure it's only natural for a 14-year old to have 16 hours' sleep every night. Of course I am not even a little bit envious.

"The examiner doesn't know what you don't know." Flashbacks take me to the last days of school and the advice of ex-teachers (whom I would now be lost without).

To check the necessities:

Breakfast - lots of carbos and natural sugars for high levels of sustainable energy. Apples, oranges, bananas, grapes, toast and thick peel marmalade - there'll be no gutless wonders in this house.

Pens - blue or black and lots of them.

Sweets and water - the exam is over three hours long; breaks shall be required.

Luck and prayers - it is never too late.

And off we go, REM's It's the End of the World as We Know It rides the merry-go-round in my mind, resonating in my ears. Then I tell myself to cop on and stop being so melodramatic. We're not the first and we're certainly not the last to sit the Leaving. At least we are getting an education. But now is not the time to preach on global inequality. Let's face the music and dance!