I've decided. Putting it bluntly, it's time to put up or shut up. I'm stressed out, worn out and, worst of all, bored out of my mind. I have spent 11 years motivating and assessing, correcting and praising, nursing and policing.
I must change or I'll find myself still here in 20 years time muttering "Caol le caol, leathan le leathan" as they wheel me off to the local Home for Chronically Repetitive Teachers.
So, what can I do? Teachers aren't very employable, moans a friend who's teetering on the brink of throwing it all up and eating the peach, too. I'm a little put off at this crude dismissal of our myriad of talents, our organisational abilities, our interpersonal skills won through years of warding off hostile parents and unco-operative pupils.
Look at all the teachers who have gone on to greater (or at least other) things, I challenge this non-believer. Name 10, is her parry to my smugness. What about Pee Flynn? (Well, what about him?) John McGahern, Carrie Crowley, Roddy Doyle, Gabriel Byrne, Mick Lally, Micheal O Muircheartaigh etc., I hedge confidently. I will not be deterred this early in my odyssey.
And, so, salvation seems to be at hand in the guise of a course advertised in my local education centre: a master's in studies. Year one is a diploma in information and communication technology. With that under my belt I should be able to zoom past any little fart with an attitude on the information superhighway.
I will update my skills, meet new like-minded individuals, get ideas for a career change and, ultimately, be fulfilled, accomplished and, oh, financially rewarded too. Well, all right, materialism is alive and well with me, in the form of a mortgage hanging weightily around my neck. It can't be ignored.
In truth, I'm petrified. It's years since I read anything more demanding than Hello magazine. I've become intellectually lethargic and I'd recommend it to anyone. It's truly indulgent to lie back and read something that puts so little expectations on your grey cells. I cringe inwardly at the thought of long sessions in the library, but I must be positive. "It will pay off" is my mantra.
At an information evening, a small but tangibly excited group of prospective students waits to give it their all in the name of advancement. I sidle nearer to a group chatting animatedly. The gist of their conversation seems to be megabytes and RAM and search engines. Ye wha, Gay?
The course facilitator appears and tries a pep talk. The straw that breaks this particular camel's back is at hand - he says that there should be good employment prospects for graduates in the field of training other teachers in information technology. Teaching teachers! You must be joking! That defeats the whole purpose of going back to study - it was the prospect of employment which motivated this group of reluctant participators in the quest for IT enlightenment.
Maybe this is not the course for me after all - I haven't yet found my niche. Anyone out there interested in a multi-talented education facilitator with special interest in starting at the bottom? Anything that doesn't involve chalk or talk - and I'm your woman!
