Freshly initiated in the way of the turtle, Bertie Ahern was feeling invincible, writes Miriam Lord.Middle-aged Mutant Ninja Taoiseach thrust out his arm, the better to display a rock steady hand. Dead calm," noted Black Belt Bertie, trying his best to appear inscrutable. "Not a nerve in the body."
And with that, he swept down the stairs with his new Taekwon-Do suit and belt in a plastic bag, all set to kick lumps out of the Opposition when the post-Budget election campaign begins.
It is wrong to say we were bitterly disappointed with this turn of events yesterday morning. Nobody really expected the Taoiseach to wear a white martial arts outfit in front of the cameras, even if it would show off his honorary black belt.
But hope - like Bertie's public engagements diary - springs eternal, which explains the large media turnout in Dublin to mark the 25th anniversary of the Taekwon-Do Association's national headquarters.
In the end, all the Dublin North Central Ninja would do was hold up the black belt and smile. For Bertie is on a posterity drive; he is a man in the early days of cementing his legacy to the nation.
Let there be no silly photographs to dent the image.
Of course, all this statesman stuff will go out the window when the election starts. The exquisite etiquette of the Taekwon-Do arena may prove a flying kick too far today, but Bertie would wear an inflatable Sumo suit on the hustings if he thought it might save Fianna Fáil a seat.
For now, his careful side is on view. Yesterday morning, he talked down this week's Budget, while maintaining an air of cool confidence.
"It's not going to be a giveaway budget, we are going to continue the prudent management of the economy for the future," he said, continuing the government's policy of prudent management of voter expectations.
Then he hinted it would be nice to assist people on welfare and maybe see the old-age pension breaking the €200 barrier. Furthermore, there are "challenges" to be faced in the area of tax policy. (No point in overstating the prudence line when the state is awash with cash.)
Taekwon-Do experts - a Korean form of martial art - would divine that the Taoiseach is in a Moosa Junbi Sogi at the moment. He is in a "warrior ready stance". Bertie has never practised a martial art, preferring to tread the more vicious path of politics. However, instructors Brendan O'Toole and Gerry Martin told him he represents the five tenets of Taekwon-Do: courtesy, integrity, perseverance, self-control and indomitable spirit. This is why he was chosen to become the first person in Ireland to be awarded an honorary black belt (third degree) by the International Federation.
It's the first recorded instance of Bertie Ahern getting the third degree and enjoying the experience. Despite the honour, he will not be able to dispense with his Garda protection, as his black belt is purely for show. Nor is he entitled to call himself Grand Master Bertie. He might consider wearing the suit to cabinet, though. It might intimidate Michael McDowell in a way all those honorary law doctorates never could.
As well as the suit and black belt Bertie was also presented with a black belt pin displaying the turtle symbol. The turtle represents longevity, rather like the Taoiseach, who is going for a record third term in office.