"I'm not telling ya how they got to be that size," triumphant competitor Michael Walton told the newspapers' the judges awarded his large leeks with a rosette. It's secret. But what I will tell ya that you have to think like a vegetable. You know I had to grow carrots to get three perfect ones this. And they all have to be the same size. The soil temperature has to go up before the seeds germinate. That's around the beginning of March."
Wearing two inch heels, Munster Express reporter Gabrielle Monaghan told us as much about herself as about the Piltown show as she first appraised the oversized vegetables ("someone tried telling me they don't put stereoids (sic) in the soil when they're growing them"), then moved on to the flower arranging section. "It was always difficult for me to understand what enticed people to spend hours gardening anyway. Insects, worms and weeds," she wrote.
"You spend a couple of months nurturing, tending to your flowers as if they were sensitive children. Then you chop off the ends, stick them in a vase, a visitor admires them for 30 seconds and then they die. For years, I have watched my mother stay out in the garden for hours, toiling over a couple of shrubs, probably tripping over the shovel in the dark. I don't believe she even notices when it gets dark. I used to find myself wondering if I'd wake up some morning and find her sleeping on top of the dahlias."
Monaghan then pronounced herself "mesmerised" by a couple of huge tractors, particularly a £43,500 New Holland. "With an investment like that, I'd insist that the whole family takes turns sleeping in it," she said.
Former Rose of Tralee Muirne Hurley certainly isn't thinking like a vegetable. "Fine Gael, desperate to find a new vote-catching candidate in Limerick East for the next general election, will be told `no thanks'" by Ms Hurley, the Limerick Leader informed us. Fine Gael is looking for a "surprise candidate" to run with the Minister for Health, Michael Noonan. Many in Fine Gael thought that 25 year old Muirne was an ideal candidate because she is a marketing graduate and could attract the young vote.
Marketing itself to attract the "family tourist" is the goal of Tralee, Co Kerry. The Kerryman reported plans for a £20 million Rose of Tralee theme shopping and leisure development featuring a 7,500 square foot theme pub, a multi purpose arena, hotels and factory shop outlets "like Clarkes, Currys, Polo, Armani and Gucci selling out of season, returned and slow selling lines". Presumably, the lines sold by Gucci and the like would not be "slow selling" in Tralee.
Local political dramas are being acted out across the country with coverage in many newspapers, none stranger than the Dungarvan Leader's account of the "potentially disastrous" internal row among Fianna Fail party ranks in Waterford. The party's "naked divisions" went public after two rebel FF members were ousted from their positions as party whip (Cllr Paddy Kennealy) and chairman of the councillors' group (Cllr Jimmy Quirke). "Heated exchanges and furious outpourings, although not on the agenda of the Waterford County Council meeting, soon became plentiful," wrote Aisling Conroy. The majority of council members looked on with "wry amusement" as Cllr O Riain put in a "feisty" defence of his position, ending in "an obscure Cantona-like comment, `I've one final thing to say the paths of glory lead but to the grave'".
The Northern Standard saw a calmer side to Fianna Fail when "Bertie" brought politics to the people in Monaghan last week. "The Ahern style, more relaxed and approachable than some of his predecessors, was reflected in this latest manifestation of FF's `meet the people' policy of staging front bench meetings in different parts of the country."
Dara Cinemas eschewed the usual critics' quotes for its front page display in the Leinster Leader for Phenomenon, with John Travolta, in favour of a more personal note. "One of the most moving films ever. Ladies, the final moments will have you in tears... so bring a few tissues." The men, apparently, are expected to wipe their dribbling sentiments on their sleeves.
In Shannon, the public lighting system is in disarray, with some lights vandalised and others switched off until 11 p.m., reported the Limerick Leader. At a monthly meeting of Shannon Town Commissioners, Peter Flannigan said the future may be for all Shannon households to be issued with torches.
