It was a long, hot day in the Dáil. Apparently it was warm outside too. But in Leinster House, due to heat rising from the fax machines of Opposition justice spokesmen, it was sweltering.
A flushed Ciarán Cuffe (Green Party) arrived for the Garda Bill debate to report that his fax was in meltdown dealing with last-minute amendments from the Minister. Fine Gael's Jim O'Keeffe calculated that the total number of tabled amendments to the Bill ran to 44 pages, and counting. At least the justice spokesmen had something to fan themselves with.
Michael McDowell's failure to appear in the chamber when - after some delays - the Bill was finally moved only increased the temperature. Amid uproar, the Opposition wondered if he was still slaving over a hot photocopier somewhere. But the truth was even more dramatic.
Earlier, accusing Mr McDowell of a Minister- knows-best approach to the Bill, Pat Rabbitte complained that "the man who was the biggest critic of the nanny state has turned out to be the greatest nanny of them all".
As if to prove the point, the Minister had left the Dáil to launch a childcare initiative. On the other hand, if he really were that great a nanny, he wouldn't have left his deputy, Brian Lenihan, holding the baby.
Mr Lenihan is the junior minister responsible for children. But he would have needed an advanced qualification in creche management to keep order as the Opposition spat the dummy and assailed the missing Minister for his arrogance.
A number of speakers proposed adjourning until the "cafe bar kid" - Finian McGrath's description - could attend. Jim O'Keeffe suggested going to the High Court for a habeas corpus order. Protest votes were called.
Fax machines and deputies had cooled a little by the afternoon, when the debate finally got under way, with the Minister present. Although many of the Government's 112 amendments were technical, Labour's Joe Costello fretted that the important ones would not be discussed before the guillotine fell. The fact that the Minister had apparently bowed to Opposition demands on the nature of the Garda ombudsman ("very arrogant of me!" quipped Mr McDowell) did not lessen the need for debate.
In fact, it was a technical amendment by Sinn Féin that illustrated Mr Costello's worries about time. The house spent 20 minutes arguing about Aengus Ó Snodaigh's proposal that the Bill should refer to "An Garda Síochána" rather than "The Garda Síochána": a correction that would doubtless be welcomed in Gaeltacht areas (although in Donegal, at least, they may have more pressing reforms to worry about).
All speakers agreed the Sinn Féin man had a point; even Mr O'Keeffe, who nevertheless supported the use of "the" on the grounds that "if it was good enough for Kevin O'Higgins in 1925", it was good enough now.