England 5 San Marino 0
Roy Hodgson looked satisfied enough on the final whistle, offering commiserations and a handshake to his opposite number, Piermangelo Manzaroli, but there were times when even inflicting a thrashing had felt humdrum. The latest advertisement for smaller nations to pre-qualify for qualification campaigns had followed a predictable course. San Marino had been stubborn for a while, outclassed throughout and overwhelmed long before the end.
This was almost the most uncompetitive of competitive fixtures conceivable and, consequently, hardly a source of much satisfaction. England did what they needed to do professionally enough, moving the ball more smoothly after the interval and making in-roads as a result, but they will have treated this as a warm-up for a slightly more awkward occasion against Estonia on Sunday. Or, if that contest follows similar lines, even Slovenia next month.
Those on the home bench had stopped celebrating the goals before the end and there had been ironic cheers whenever the lonely Joe Hart swept up a Sammarinese punt forward or, shock horror, was even charged with mustering a clearance. He could afford to doze off. The last time San Marino scored away from home in a competitive game was back in 2001. They never threatened to break that duck here.
This had the feeling of a training drill from the outset, both teams crammed into the Sammarinese half for the majority of a mismatch and largely played out to a polite, murmuring hubbub in the stands more normally associated with Lord’s further down the Jubilee Line.
San Marino flung down their quintet at the back and quartet in midfield with Andy Selva, their 38-year-old captain on his 67th cap, a token presence near the halfway line. For a while, those in blue blunted the home side’s threat through sheer weight of numbers, clogging up the play with bodies. Yet an amateurish mistake had undermined a part-time team before the half-hour and that was effectively that.
Hodgson, had demanded tempo and zip in the pass, some effervescence to maintain the momentum from that impressive victory in Switzerland last month in the only relatively daunting fixture Group E had conjured.
He had retained his diamond formation, albeit with James Milner preferred at the base rather than Jack Wilshere - in itself a mildly surprising decision in that the Arsenal player might have benefited from game-time in the deeper role if that is, indeed, to be his future - and the onus on movement and pace to unnerve the joint-worst side in the international game. There were times when his team responded in the early stages when the visitors were at their freshest, as Raheem Sterling scuttled into space or Wilshere fed the ball wide to an overlapping Kieran Gibbs, on a first start in almost four years. The Arsenal left-back provided some width and quality down that flank.
In contrast Gibbs’ club-mate, Calum Chambers, struggled on the opposite flank on his first senior start with the team’s passing too ponderous. The hosts needed swifter transition and better incision down the wings to slice these rivals apart, with Hodgson wearing a scowl for most of the opening period as his team ran aground. The victory was never in doubt, but the convincing nature of the thrashing was threatened.
A pair of Milner corners delivered the lead. The first was met by Phil Jagielka, who was permitted to loop a free header into the gaping net after Simoncini tripped over his team-mate Luca Tosi’s foot in the six-yard box. The goalkeeper’s suggestion he had been fouled by an England player was about as comical as his attempt to claim the centre. Selva was just as panicked three minutes from the interval as he swung a boot at a high ball and caught Wayne Rooney in the face. The captain converted the penalty with glee.
This was all vaguely familiar. It had taken 35 minutes to deflate San Marino’s resolve two years ago in World Cup qualifying, the haul eventually swollen to five against tiring legs. The introduction of Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain and Adam Lallana at the interval, with Wilshere dropping deeper, injected more energy and urgency into the performance and a team who have won only once in 124 international fixtures duly wilted.
Lallana was busy in possession and had a goal incorrectly chalked off for offside, but Oxlade-Chamberlain’s first real involvement was to embarrass Manuel Battistini and centre for Danny Welbeck, another of the five Arsenal players on the pitch at the time, to convert at the near-post. The GBP16m signing from Manchester United now boasts 11 goals for his country, the same tally as Sir Stanley Matthews.
The rat-a-tat of chances was extended to the end, even if Simoncini denied Rooney when he over-elaborated, with England greedy for late rewards. Another substitute, Andros Townsend,grew tired of all the intricate passing and skimmed a shot in from distance beyond the goalkeeper at his near post.
The hosts’ fifth was another of the minnows’ self-inflicted wounds, Alessandro Della Valle deflecting Rooney’s cross into his own net, and England declared thereafter almost out of pity. Enough was enough. On to Tallinn.
Guardian Service