Separating the enemies from the few friends

In the spirit of the season, this week my contribution to your enlightenment on matters European is a poem. Not my own poem, let me assure you, but Benny Andersen's.

Never let it be said there's no culture in my column, and such is the state of the dwindling band of Diary loyalists at this time of the year that I must use every ploy in the book - I'm thinking of a comic strip for my next trick. Andersen is one of Denmark's favourite poets, a Scandinavian Paul Durcan, whose accessible verse plays with language and the everyday. He observes Danish life with gentle irony, poking fun at its laid-back, understated quality.

"Life is not the worst thing we have," one of his most celebrated lines has it, "and in a few minutes the coffee will be ready." A versatile jazz pianist, he has put much of his verse to music and accompanies a friend, the singer Poul Dissing, on tour. Dissing's voice has a strange quality to it - "a bit like Dylan", I suggest to a colleague. "Oh no, much less tuneful," he replies.

The poem below was read recently by the Danish ambassador to the EU, Mr Poul Sky tte Christoffersen, to illustrate the diplomatic challenges facing a foreign minister. He was introducing his own minister, Mr Neils Helvig Petersen, to a group of journalists . . . but the lines have a certain resonance with a peace process much closer to home.

Dear friends

I have two friends

who are enemies

and two enemies

who are friends.

One of my friends is a friend of one of my enemies.

My other friend is an enemy of my other enemy's friend.

It's difficult to keep track of whom one should be careful not to say what to.

A reconciliation would simplify things considerably

so I strongly go in for

turning the other cheek

but in the long run haven't enough cheeks

try to mobilise my friends' cheeks.

This has made one of my enemies friendly

and one of my friends unfriendly.

My other enemy has become an enemy of his friend

and my other friend has become a friend of my other enemy's former friend

but then an enemy of his own former friend.

I seriously consider calling the whole thing off

pulling my cheeks in

and starting afresh.

Benny Andersen - translated from the Danish by the author - from Cosmopolitan in Denmark - and other poems about the Danes.