It is simply not enough, as Jerry Hall once believed, to be a maid in the parlour, a cook in the kitchen and a whore in the bedroom. Not if you are unfortunate enough to be married to a serial adulterer. And certainly not if the philanderer you have tried in vain for 21 years to hold onto goes by the name of Mick Jagger.
It's not really Mick's fault. The middle-aged Lothario is a super-rich rock star with a musical pedigree that goes all the way back to the swinging Sixties - a mix that has proved fatally attractive to some of the world's most beautiful women. Flaws include having skin with all the appeal of a pickled walnut shell and an infuriating unwillingness to do the decent thing i.e. roll over and (in a rock 'n' roll sense) die.
But you can't have everything.
Unless you are Jagger. He has been having his French (or Brazilian, or Italian or American) fancies and grazing gratuitously on them for most of his adult life. His glamorous golden-tressed model wife is still a stunningly attractive woman with a seemingly endless capacity to forgive. She has given birth to and raised four of his six children. None of this matters to Mick who, it seems, still can't get no satisfaction.
But satisfaction, if revenge is to be the final dish on the couple's marital menu, is within the grasp of his wife, who has reached breaking point at her husband's latest dalliance. The final insult is 29-year-old Brazilian model Luciana Gimenze Morad, whom tabloid newspapers claim is three months pregnant by Jagger.
Reports in the British press suggest she has been promised £500,000 sterling to keep quiet about Mick's role in her impending motherhood. Her meeting in New York this week with Raoul Felder, Hall's divorce lawyer, suggest mistress and wife could be in cahoots. Half a million is a somewhat derisory offer after all, when what is up for grabs is half of Jagger's reputed £140 million fortune.
Just a few days before news of the Brazilian broke this week, an older flame was spotted with Jagger in Paris. Italian supermodel Carla Bruni (31) had nearly been the reason for the rockiest union in the music world ending when in 1992 she became another of Jagger's conquests.
The list of lovers is endless with everyone from David Bowie to Madonna having been romantically linked to the androgynous frontman in the past. An Internet site (www.mrshowbiz.com) advises surfers to buy a bigger monitor when down-loading a list of his suspected partners.
Even in the mid-1970s, when they first met, it was a questionable match. Jagger had pranced and pouted his way to rock's upper echelons since becoming the lead singer with the Rolling Stones offering a grittier, if more musically limited, alternative to The Beatles. Many of their hits were heavily laced with misogyny or sex. Or sometimes both.
America had fallen heavily for their charms, there had been the obligatory drug busts, a sexual tryst with 1960s pin-up Marianne Faithfull and the controversial death of one of their members.
The sex symbol status was already secure, the full-lipped enigma in full flight when Jagger, then married to the equally pouty model Bianca, met Jerry. He had already fathered his first child, Karis, with actress and author Marsha Hunt. Hall had been a successful model ever since an agent spotted her backpacking in France. When she bumped into Jagger she was already engaged to singer Bryan Ferry who was soon out of the picture, as was Bianca. It was Jagger's "untamed" quality that appealed to Hall she has said.
They had two children and were together for 13 years before she finally convinced him to get married. He had vowed he never would again, saying "in our society there is no reason to get married" and "In fact I love women, I'm absorbed by them."
The day after Hall gave birth to their third child, Georgia, in 1993, Jagger's relationship with Bruni became public knowledge when they were seen together in Thailand, prompting Hall to issue the first in a long line of ultimatums.
They patched it up and have been darning the same spot ever since. It was the reappearance of Bruni which precipitated another showdown in 1996 and a clinch with actress Uma Thurman (in a church) that led to more marital discord.
Hall consulted London divorce lawyer Anthony Julius (the chap who got Princess Diana her whopping settlement) for the first time but within a year she was pregnant again. Their fourth child, Gabriel, now 11 months, was dubbed a "Kiss and Make Up Baby" by the tabloids.
It is not just the ageing rock fossil's waywardness that is causing headaches in the couple's many households.
Recently, Jagger went through the roof when his wife allowed their 14-year-old daughter Elizabeth to appear on the cover of Harpers and Queen and to take up a modelling career. The Rolling Stones front man who himself refuses to get off the stage did not want his daughter exposed to the same kind of "roller coaster lifestyle".
Two other gripes are his wife's spendthrift ways and the fact that their 11-month-old son still sleeps in their bed.
For his part he seems incapable of curbing his seemingly insatiable appetite for tall, leggy mannequins.
"You can't stop having affairs if they come along," Jagger has said. "But there is a difference between that and trying to be with every girl you meet."
In the past Hall has been philosophical: "You know we always live in hope. There is nothing more humiliating than loving someone so much that you forgive their infidelities," she has said.
One rock groupie who has been there done that, explains the sexual motivation of Jagger: "Sexually, he pushes himself to the limits, sampling all colours, all classes. There is no stopping him . . . Mick is the greatest practitioner of cosmic sex."
Hall could be hoping that the prospect of losing half his fortune might be just the carrot Jagger needs finally to stop showing off in countless bedrooms as well as on stage.
Otherwise this could indeed be the last time for Jerry and Mick. And in that case, there won't be too much sympathy for the devil.