Sir, – This year has been a difficult one for many. People throughout the world are deeply saddened to learn of the deaths of children and their teachers in Newtown, Connecticut. This comes on top of the terrible sadness which we in Ireland feel as a result of the deaths of children and young people who have taken their own lives.
Many of us are now deeply distressed and frightened that someone we love may choose to do the same. On behalf of the staff and volunteers of Aware I would like to express our condolences to people who have been bereaved by suicide. There are very few families in Ireland who have not been touched in some way by suicide and there is a real fear that anyone could be next.
We would like to emphasise three key points: 1. Just because someone has thoughts that they would be better off dead does not mean that he or she is suicidal – such thoughts are actually quite common; 2. Just because someone has thoughts of taking his/her own life does not mean the person has to do it – there are always alternative options; and 3. Just because someone has depression does not mean that he/she will inevitably take his/her own life – many, many people experience depression and recover to find moments of peace and happiness once more.
Christmas can be a wonderful time, but it can also be a very difficult time, particularly for those with depression. There can be an expectation that everyone will feel happy and that to feel unhappy is to be a failure.
Let 2013 be the year in which we each learn to be gentle and calm with feelings – our own and those of others. Let us accept that just as some days there are clouds in the sky, some days we will feel better or worse than others and that there is no need to panic.
Let us recognise our thoughts as “helpful” or “unhelpful”, challenge beliefs we might have such as “nobody cares” or “there is no point” and most of all let us learn to deliberately focus on the helpful actions we can do each and every day. – Yours, etc,