Leo Varadkar, Johnny Sexton and Michael D ... here are your new year resolutions

Hot on the heels of the Christmas splurge and wanton bacchanalia, we have arrived on the doorstep of a sobering new year. Around the world this weekend, multitudes of well-intentioned people are making resolutions for 2023 in a mass annual life-decluttering exercise that makes Marie Kondo look like a lie-abed lazybones. The heavens will be bombarded with promises to forswear chocolate and alcohol, walk more and join a gym, or – the best one of all because it defies auditing and, therefore, can be easily broken – to be a better person.

Some who do not subscribe to the Beckettian maxim of trying and failing and trying again and failing better will resolve to make no resolution at all. A small and select number of others will adopt the philosophy that, if it ain’t broke, why fix it? To avoid their exclusion from the great annual closing conversation of self-improvement for the coming year, here are some pointers for the resolution-reluctant.

1. President Michael D Higgins, one of the world’s most popular heads of state, can seem to do no wrong. When he declined an invitation to an event in Armagh marking the foundation of the Northern Ireland state and, subsequently, when he decried the country’s housing crisis as “a disaster”, opinion polls showed a majority of people supported him. Yet, even for someone of his faultlessness, there is scope to do better in 2023 as we brace ourselves for further economic gloom, continuing war in Europe and the slow death of the planet. The President should do what he does best – talk to us, via an address to the Oireachtas. There are times when a nation needs hand-holding and no better one to do it than a head of state whose appeal transcends all ages.

2. Taoiseach Leo Varadkar is so good he got the top job twice, midway through two governments. His party and its supporters eulogise his “straight-talking” reputation for “telling it as it is”. Except he doesn’t always. The Fine Gael leader, whose relative youth is one of his political assets, showed his age when he was asked about the housing crisis that is crippling the country and responded that it was not unique to Ireland and, besides, faraway grass always looks greener. If he wants to keep down with the kids, the Taoiseach, who will be 43 next month, needs to tweak his antennae to the zeitgeist and acknowledge that the lack of housing is driving yet another disenchanted generation into a brain-drain of emigration.

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3. The English language is an exquisite creation and its lyrical use in this country has long been acclaimed, as manifested in four Nobel literature laureates and Dublin’s designation as a Unesco city of literature. While many Irish contemporary novelists still uphold high standards, journalists and broadcasters continue to mangle the language. It is bad enough that the generations reared on Friends and the Simpsons speak with accents that sound more at home in midtown Manhattan, but the Americanisation of Ireland’s mediaspeak has gone beyond the bounds of toleration. For the coming year, there shall be no more “upticks” or “reaching out”. The misuse of the word “impact” as a verb shall be verboten and the perfectly good verb “to affect ‘’ shall be restored to its rightful place in public discourse. Planning for the future will involve analysis of the “lie of the land” while the “lay of the land” may be assessed in drunken nightclub assemblies. Sadly, in the coming year, people will die; not pass. People pass the window. We pass the butter. We pass the time of day. And then we die.

4. Ireland’s men’s rugby corps may be deemed to have reached perfection after their triumph over the All-Blacks in New Zealand pushed them to the top of the world rankings and Josh van der Flier won both the European and the world player of the year trophies. But there can be no resting on their laurels as they prepare for the 2023 Rugby World Cup in France. In the finest tradition of child movie star Shirley Temple, the legend of the Irish in World Cup history has been that they peak too soon. This time, they will need to show they have held something in reserve, along with Johnny Sexton. Were they to win the tournament the boost it would give the country could be akin to the effect of the 1990 soccer World Cup when newbies Ireland got to the quarter finals, generating such a surge of national pride and confidence that, according to various experts, it was the catalyst for an economic boom.

5. The location of multinational IT behemoths in Ireland has brought the country great economic advantages but the relationship has responsibilities as well as benefits and users of social media need to put their money where their 280 characters go. When Twitter’s new owner, Elon Musk, banned some journalists from the platform after they tracked the movements of his private jet, their colleagues piled on to Twitter to deplore the sanction. Instead of leaving the platform en masse in protest, they chose to keep their bread buttered on both sides, displaying their virtuous outrage on the very medium that provoked it. In 2023, everyone might think twice about engaging with a publisher that unashamedly promulgates censorship.

6. And, finally, we come to Ireland itself. The people of Ireland are phenomenally compassionate, as the people of Ireland love to keep reminding ourselves. That makes it no less true. Ireland’s donations to humanitarian causes and the work of Irish NGOs in helping to relieve suffering and injustice around the globe remain proportionately high. Despite accommodation and logistical problems at State level, the country has responded generously to the tens of thousands of Ukrainians fleeing Russia’s invasion of their country. While the great kindness has been laudable it has exposed a doublethink in how we treat people who arrive here from different countries. This is a quirk in collective thinking that is ripe for exploitation by racist agitators. In the coming year, Ireland must resolve to guard against creating a two-tier hierarchy of immigrants.

Finally, we also need to not be too hard on ourselves. Ireland may not be the best little country in the world, but it’s far from being the worst.

Happy new year.