Miriam Lord’s Week: Willie O’Dea and the Phantom visit

Parking spaces at Leinster House are at a premium at this time of the year, what with so many former TDs and senators availing of their lifetime free parking perk in one of Dublin city centre’s most convenient spots. They dump their cars within the magic gates and toddle off for the day to do Christmas shopping.

This can present a problem to the hard-pressed ushers, who can’t always be expected to know a face or recognise the name of some hoary old senator or TD who barely warmed an Oireachtas seat for a brief period back in the day. Some of them (we’ve seen it happen) are deeply affronted when they aren’t recognised and a uniformed functionary has to ask who they are.

Speaking of the ushers, congratulations to Phil Donnelly, who quietly breached an Oireachtas glass ceiling this week when she was promoted to the rank of team leader, joining a select group of male colleagues. Women ushers were appointed in 1994 and it’s taken 21 years for Phil to become the first woman to earn a stripe.

Wheels of fortune

Back to the car parks, and it was very busy at the Merrion Street entrance on Tuesday morning.

At one point, a man we didn’t recognise drew up in his car and waited behind the wheel. But the barrier stayed in place. The usher didn’t recognise him either.

It was a nice car, though.

This driver, we mused, must have done very well for himself since quitting politics – a profession to which he was clearly unsuited because nobody knew who he was.

It took a major effort to swing the vehicle through the gates, and when the manoeuvre was complete the enormous, very shiny, Rolls Royce Phantom with Jersey registered plates just about managed to fit in the gap.

Diminutive

But wait! There was somebody else in the car. You could see the top of his head above the dashboard. The door opened and the diminutive passenger scuttled over to the security hut.

But, alas, there was no room for the Roller, the mystery driver and his passenger Willie O’Dea. So they had to back out and drive away.

Onlookers wondered if the former minister for justice had won the Euromillions jackpot.

Others reckoned election specialist Willie was road-testing a new campaign vehicle. He’d certainly get plenty of attention around the streets of Limerick in the Phantom, although he’ll have to buy a booster seat if he wants the voters to see him.

FF headquarters will be delighted to hear that O’Dea is mixing with the Rolls Royce set.

He might even manage to cadge a few donations for them, always welcome in the run-up to an election.

Nice to see the Old Firm keeping in touch

Two well-known rugby stalwarts were spotted hanging out together at a Division 2A rugby match in Skerries last weekend.

The home team, despite a gallant second-half revival, were beaten by Belfast visitors Malone. It was a game of two halves, according to a thrilling match report on the Skerries RFC website.

“In miserable conditions, as the rain fell sideways, the stunned home crowd were further numbed by the apparent avalanche of opposition tries in the first half.”

The report fails to mention why the home crowd was initially stunned. This might have been down to the actual, not apparent, arrival of none other than Bertie Ahern and Charlie McCreevy at the prematch lunch.

While both men are big into sport, former finance minister McCreevy is more of a horsey man while Bertie is known to favour the round ball over the oval.

On a social level, they were never known to be bosom buddies. But there they were, together again, in the best of form. Just like in the old days, when the boom was getting boomier, before it went bustier.

We hear they were in the company of club member Brendan Walsh, who lives locally with his wife Mandy Johnston.

Mandy was McCreevy’s press officer and went on to become Ahern’s government press secretary, before being appointed his special adviser in 2007. She is now a newspaper columnist and communications director with the Irish League of Credit Unions.

Bertie, Charlie and Mandy. A most formidable team. Nice to see the Old Firm keeping in touch.

We’re not sure if McCreevy will be at Bertie’s big bash tonight. He’s hosting a celebratory reunion of supporters and staff who worked with him at the Department of the Taoiseach. We understand former ministers are not on the guest list.

A big crowd is expected at Home Farm soccer club on Dublin’s northside. The knees -up will be the first gathering of the Bertie-era crew since it all came crashing down after 11 years and three successive terms in government.

Enda still on song despite Perry case

As this political year draws to a close, the Government is busily clearing the legislative decks.

This means the Taoiseach has given himself the option to pull the plug in early January, although most deputies seem to think he won’t call the election until the end of the month.

It should be an uneventful final week in Leinster House, but Fine Gael will be casting a nervous eye in the direction of the Four Courts on Tuesday when sitting TD John Perry’s High Court challenge over the handling of his Sligo-Leitrim selection convention is due to be heard.

Perry, who failed to get on the general election ticket, is threatening to call the Taoiseach to give evidence.

John’s a very determined individual. Fine Gael held a special meeting on Wednesday for all its candidates, who were addressed by the Taoiseach and briefed by senior strategists.

Perry received an invitation by email, which was rapidly retrieved by headquarters, but the TD had already printed it out.

Then the venue was switched from the Royal College of Physicians to the Fine Gael party rooms in Leinster House. Luckily for Perry, a colleague mentioned the change.

He marched into the meeting and sat through it, much to the discomfort of the big wigs at the top table.

The atmosphere was more relaxed at Fine Gael’s annual media drinks on Tuesday night, where we hear Enda Kenny led a midnight sing-song.

The following night Joan Burton hosted a get-together in Toner’s pub on Baggot Street. It wasn’t long before there were dark mutterings of skulduggery.

To the puzzlement of the Labour people, there was a marked absence of journalists, despite the fact that free drink was on offer.

Finally, a posse of hacks descended on the scene. “Sorry we’re late” announced one of them, looking rather flushed. “We were in the Dáil bar.

Alan Kelly (pictured) phoned from Paris and left instructions with the staff to stand us all a drink.

This did not go down well, with some party figures interpreting AK47’s gesture as a brazen attempt to undermine his Tánaiste’s festive soiree.

Fianna Fáil are out of the traps next week with a pre-election wooing session in Doheny and Nesbitts. And Sinn Féin, as usual, won’t be wasting any money on the ingrates in the establishment media.