Who Wants To Be A Millionaire RTE 1, Sunday
Who Wants To Be A Millionaire ITV, Sunday
Inspector Morse ITV, Saturday
I have already sung the praises of RTE's Who Wants To Be A Million-aire in these pages before. It is a tremendously well-produced, very professionally-made show, and a credit to our national broadcasting station. I do, however, need to make a small re-assessment of the programme, as in my first review I made a few minor errors, which included naming Mike Murphy as the presenter rather than Gay Byrne. This was due to the fact that I had overdosed on heroin the night before while watching Leargas, and rather than heeding the doctor's advice and taking things easy, I foolishly decided to go out "on the town" with my partner, the nationalist poet Orla Ni Suibh, "out-of-it" musician Shane MacGowan, writer Mannix Flynn and the actor, Alan Devlin. I did, however, remember to videotape the programme and, on my return to our flat in Howth, watched it at 5 a.m. with Orla, Shane, and the feminist writers Margaret Atwood and Kate Millet, friends of Shane whom we had met in Reynard's. (They both hated Orla, thinking she was too much of a radical feminist. I know how they feel!
We all agreed that the show was top class. What I thought was most refreshing about it was that at last here was a home-produced programme that appeared to be a completely original idea. (A small diversion: Atwood and Millet proved to be absolutely hopeless at the simpler questions! They had no idea that Navan was in Co Meath or that Ogie Moran played Gaelic football for Kerry! How on God's earth, I wondered, had these world-renowned feminists ever become such brilliant academics and authors without even the most basic elements of general knowledge?)
But, back to Millionaire: unlike other RTE productions, which shamelessly copy programmes from Britain (Question Time becoming Questions and Answers, University Challenge becoming Challenging Times, etc., etc. ad infinitum), the Gay Byrne-hosted show thankfully owes little to outside influences. When I saw it later in a more sober condition, I was even more impressed. Its immediate success with the viewing public was a much deserved slap in the face/kick up the arse/knee in the groin for all the smart alec reviewers who delight in slagging off RTE.
Imagine my surprise, then, when I inadvertently switched on my television set on Sunday night to see a replica version of the show on ITV! For once, it seemed the tables had been turned. The programme was almost exactly the same as the RTE original! Sets, format and presentation were strikingly similar, and the only difference I could see was that Gay Byrne had been replaced by a rather overly smooth man (a robot?) wearing a blonde wig who looked like a younger version of the Nazi broadcaster, Francis Stuart. Also, the contestants weren't quite as gobsmackingly dim. How strange to hear WWTBAM contestants with English accents! I have reported this blatant plagiarism to the appropriate authorities, and hopefully the ITV rip-off merchants will soon get their come-uppance.
The new series of Inspector Morse on ITV opened with the revelation that Morse hadn't, in fact, died in the last series, and the whole thing had been a dream. I wasn't sure if "the whole thing" meant just his death or his entire career as Inspector Morse. If it meant his entire career, he might have to go back to detective school and start all over again. What is clear however, is that his Lazarus-like return leaves him free to solve more murders, a task which might have proved beyond him if he had remained dead. (Although there is a precedent in Hopkirk in Randall and Hopkirk Deceased).
It looks like being a good series.
Arthur Mathews is co-writer of Father Ted. His first novel, Well-Remembered Days, will be published by Macmillan in March.