Sound off: The never-ending frustration of a certain airline

When you compare the prices of flights, an unnamed airline will offer you the best deal for getting from point A to point B. When you make the decision to go with this offer, there are lots of extra costs for basic things like luggage or a seat reservation.

Once you finish adding on all these “extras” you’ll realise that the cost of the journey is actually the same if not more than the other offers which initially seemed outrageous in comparison to that of the unnamed airline. But you’ve put in the work to get this far so you might as well just go through with it.

Once you get to the airport, go through all the demoralising security checks, buy a mediocre snack, then at the gate a representative of the unnamed airline will eye you with disappointment.

If you’re lucky enough to get on the plane early because you purchased that privilege, theme songs play continuously on a short loop. There are more mediocre snacks at even higher prices. When the plane lands, you see your guitar getting thrown on the hard ground. When you collect it, it’s been severely damaged.

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Drain your finances

This unnamed airline will continue to find ways to drain your finances and energy, and inspire other airlines to do the same. An extra seat for your violin, under the name “MR EXTRA ITEM SEAT” is booked. Then you need to purchase a seat next to yours for this MR EXTRA ITEM SEAT. You make it on to the plane and a representative from the unnamed airline will tell you that actually MR EXTRA ITEM SEAT is not allowed to sit in the middle seat, and actually he can only sit at the window, but of course the window seat is taken by someone who does not want to move. It never ends.

American multi-instrumentalist and composer Peter Broderick, known for his collaborations with Danish group Efterklang, will perform at Pavilion Theatre, Dun Laoghaire, on Sunday, September 16th. paviliontheatre.ie

[ magazine@irishtimes.com ]