Brother, sister, friend: how Foróige watches teenagers’ backs

‘You can’t change the world, but you can change someone’s world” is the guiding principle behind Foróige’s Big Brother/Big Sister campaign. Foróige, a not-for-profit organisation working with young people in Ireland since 1952, is calling for volunteers to become a “big brother” or “big sister” to a young person aged between 10 and 18. It involves giving up a couple of hours a week to hang out with and provide support to the young person who has signed up to the programme. A “match” is made based on shared interests. The mentor and young person are always of the same gender.

Damien Clarke is 32 and is a mentor to 13-year-old Daniel Cullen. Clarke, who is planning to return to college to study for a doctorate in psychology and counselling and is organising a youth conference for 2016, signed up to the Foróige programme because he wanted to do voluntary work that suited his own interests. He thinks the Big Brother campaign has a wide appeal.

“Most young people would like to do it because you get to hang out and do fun things with an older person. Daniel and I go to the Ireland soccer matches, we rent out bikes in the Phoenix Park, we walk dogs and climb the cliffs on Howth Head. We chat about school and whatever Daniel has been up to during the week. He can talk about any problems he has in his life but nothing too heavy. It’s about developing a relationship.”

Serious issues

When it comes to discussing serious issues, Clarke says that Cullen “kind of keeps his cards close to his chest. It’s probably healthier if males open up to each other but I think if Daniel had a problem, he’d let me know about it.”

Clarke says that through his friendship with Cullen, he has learned about “the different walks of life that are there. I suppose I come from a privileged background. I went to a brilliant school, Belvedere College. I realise life isn’t always that easy for some people. That has changed my perspective a little bit. I’m helping Daniel to broaden his horizons by doing things like being interviewed recently by Matt Cooper on Today FM.”

Clarke has spoken to Cullen how alcohol and drugs, were he to try them, could have a seriously negative effect on his life. But Cullen, from Summerhill in Dublin and a first-year pupil at Larkin Community School, says he has no plans to drink or take drugs. One of eight children, he enjoys Clarke’s company. Meeting up with him every week “gets me out of the house and keeps me occupied”. Cullen would ultimately like to join the Army “as a lot of my family were in the Army”.

Volunteer mentors

Mary Lynch, senior youth officer with the Big Brother/Big Sister programme, says it was introduced in Ireland in 2001. “Management at Foróige and the HSE noted that a lot of one-to-one work with young people was being done by professional staff. But most of the young people didn’t need professionals. They just needed someone to support them and they came up with the idea of volunteer mentoring.

“They searched the web to see what kinds of programmes were available and they chose Big Brother/Big Sister as it had been researched in the US and had proven positive outcomes.”

In 2005, a pilot study of the programme was carried out at NUI Galway at the university’s child and family research centre. “We had 50 ‘matches’ at the time. The outcome of the study was that the programme was highly valued by the young people, their mentors and their parents. On the back of that, we got funding to extend the programme to 14 counties. We’re affiliated to ‘Big Brother/Big Sister International’ which is based in Texas. They set the standards and procedures for the programme.”

Lynch says Big Brother/Big Sister in Ireland aims to achieve 500 matches each year in each county in which it operates. “That’s quite a high target. We also have a school programme.”

The mentors are aged from 20 upwards. “Our volunteer mentors are usually in their late 20s and early 30s, but we’ve also had some 65-year-old volunteers. More than 1,000 people have expressed an interest in the programme so we’re contacting them, meeting them one-to-one. There’s an application process which includes providing us with three references.

“The volunteers also have to be Garda vetted. Once they’re accepted on to the programme, they have to do two training courses before they’re introduced to their ‘little brothers or sisters’.

The first course is an introduction to the role of a mentor and the other course is child-protection training, which is the same as Children First, the national guidelines for protecting children. Once the matches are made, one staff person is assigned to them for however long the friendship continues. We look for an initial commitment of one year.

“They’re supervised no matter how long the friendship lasts. About 70 per cent of the matches go into a second year and some become lifelong friendships.”

The children and teenagers who are mentored are referred by “the usual referral agencies that support young people, including family support projects and social work services”.

The backgrounds of the young people are varied. Some are referred because they have siblings with special needs and they’re not getting enough attention at home, or they could be from large families, and some are from disadvantaged areas. Some might be having difficulties at school or they might have parents who’ve separated. Maybe a boy doesn’t have a male role model.

“The reasons for matching the young people with the mentors really vary.”

The programme has been shown to improve the young people’s emotional wellbeing and help their relationships with the other people in their lives. “It’s of particular benefit to young people from one-parent families. If the young person’s needs change and they need other support, we would refer them on to another service.”

Lynch has first-hand experience of the Big Brother/Big Sister programme as she was “a big sister” to a 13-year-old Nigerian girl, Jumoke Alyslohyne, 12 years ago. (Mary was 30 when the friendship was established.)

“Jumoke benefited hugely from the mentorship as she didn’t know anyone in Ireland when she first came here. She needed support to integrate into Irish culture and she needed encouragement to get involved in out-of-school activities.”

Lynch also benefited from the friendship. While it officially ended when Jumoke was 18, the pair remain friends outside the programme. “I have a whole new friend in life and that in itself is huge. As someone with five brothers, I always wanted a sister. I have that now.”

See foroige.ie