Business Opinion: It is that time of year again, when Business Opinion gives out its annual awards. First up this year is the General Custer Wrong Place Wrong Time award, which goes to the Irish directors of Parmalat's Irish subsidiary.
Ambrose Loughlin and Catherine Meenaghan found themselves in the spotlight in January when Dublin-based Eurofood IFSC got dragged into the morass of litigation and investigations surrounding the collapse of the Italian food giant.
The Ray Houghton Right Place Right Time award goes to Sir Anthony O'Reilly who trousered something in the region of €55 million as a result of his two-and-half-year stint as non-executive chairman of Eircom leading up to its return to the market in March.
Sticking with Eircom, the Jim Larkin Trade Unionist Cup is awarded to Con Scanlon, the former General Secretary of the Communications Workers Union and Irish Congress of Trade Union council member. He took home a couple of million from his two and half years as deputy chairman of Eircom.
Mr Scanlon was also a contender for the Billy Bunter Prize, but on this occasion the Golden Doughnut goes to Tony Mullins who was left looking flat footed a tad greedy when his 40 cents bid for Barlo was trumped. To have been outmanoeuvred by Dermot Desmond is something most people could live with, but having you own company whipped from from under your feet by Seán Quinn, has to hurt.
The Dead Sheep Award for ineffectiveness in regulation goes to the Irish Take Over Panel, which covered itself in glory with its handling of the takeover of Gresham Hotels.
Any overseas investors planing mischief in the Irish market, will not even have to think once before thumbing its nose at the panel.
The runner up was the Irish Financial Services Regulatory Authority, who fearlessly named two financial institutions - AIB and Irish Nationwide - during the year for being naughty. Fines? You must be joking.
As consolation IFSRA receives the Ray Burke Planning Award for managing to announced a three-year strategic plan in January, followed by a strategic plan for 2005 in November. Look out for another three year plan next month.
There was a considerable amount of competition for this award from the Enterprise Strategy Group and the National Competitiveness Council who both managed to produce pretty much the same report during the year. Both were promptly ignored by the Government.
The Dry Your Eyes Mate trophy goes to Séamus Brennan, who was forced to walk the plank ay Transport in the Autumn reshuffle. But not before he achieved his goal of splitting up Aer Rianta where out going Chairman Noel Hanlon gets the Robert Mugabe Plaque for hanging onto his job for as long as humanly possible.
The Not Without My Money scroll goes to Margaret Sweeney, the outgoing Aer Rianta chief executive who got €600,000 for resigning her post as what the Department maintains was only an acting post.
Brennan's departure signalled the end of whatever faint hopes that Willy Walsh and his colleagues had of putting together some sort of deal at Aer Lingus.
Mr Walsh along with Brian Dunne and Séamus Kearney share the John Wayne Walking the Walk Statuette as they head off into the sunset. Derek Sharman gets the Hindenberg Trophy for high risk activities in aviation for agreeing to stay on as chairman of Aer Lingus for three months because nobody wants the job.
The Gavin O'Reilly Parchment for young executives who have to deal with the special challenges of working in a business controlled by their parents, goes to Michael Heffernan.
This year the Dunnes Stores director has had to shoulder the additional burden of a €30 million stake in the business transferred to him by his mum, Margaret.
It would not be prize day with out some mention of Michael O'Leary and this year he gets a special Eamon de Valera Medal for defence of the Irish Constitution.
Michael has taken time off from orchestrating a bloodbath in European aviation to defend Bunreacht na hÉireann from the efforts of ICTU to subvert the document, which as we all know outlaws the concept of organised labour.
The Bertie Ahern Teflon Shield is awarded to Michael Buckley, who despite presiding over yet another appalling scandal at AIB, has hung onto his job. Bank of Ireland Asset Management gets the Honey I Lost The Clients Cup, as US funds followed a number of its top executives out the door in 2004.
The Golden Handbag for most entertaining spat between high profile businessmen goes to the shareholders in Real Estate Opportunities.
So enraged was Noel Smyth at Richard Barrett's put-down when he raised the issue of the company's swops accounting, that he commissioned a report into it.
The outcome was the company restated its accounts. At this stage we can confidently predict that next year's winners will be Fyffes and DCC who are busy funding the holiday homes and pension of a small army of barristers, solicitors and PR consultants down at the four courts, and will do so until the middle of next year.
The Kerry McFadden Wallflower of the Year Award is given to Bank of Scotland Ireland and its chief executive Mark Duffy.
Having booked the wedding, invited the guests and paid the band, he was unable to produce a bride for the much expected marriage with National Irish Bank.
Tony Taylor gets the Slobodan Milosevic Prize for opposing miscarriages of justice.
The convicted fraudster was released earlier this year and is determined to clear his name.
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