Care To Crack Open A Bottle?

The first round

The first round

As you pour a generous round for your companions, you momentarily stop to think that for those two-and-a-half glasses you could have bought a two-bedroom, house with garden in Mid Glamorgan (though it needs work): £5,000 sterling (€7,268).

Seconds

Your next full glass, you realise, could have been swapped for a 1992 Mini Cooper, valued at £1,890 by Auto Express.

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More than half gone

The next half glass would buy you a one-week holiday in the Seychelles. Accommodation at the Plantation Club hotel (with casino and floodlit tennis courts), including flights and transfers: £916.

A little tight

But you can't forget that, for the price of your next top-up, you could have bought 53 bottles of Moet et Chandon.

Thinking of Johnny

The next half glass would get you 83 Edward Scissorhands videos, starring Johnny Depp.

The end is in sight

But you still have enough of your wits about you to realise that this half glass would get you 21 30-gram tins of Russian beluga caviar.