Standards authority does not uphold objections to advertisement starring Peter Crouch
Callum Robinson’s booster, Newcastle if they actually won things and Super League fiasco
Tribunals have been held for lesser matters than Uefa’s woeful scheduling
The numerical mind of Nicklas Bendtner, Arsenal’s tactics in terms of lions and steaks
Covid-19 prompts revised plans for Kosovo Superleague side and Guinean champions
Duke recalls getting a policeman to shine laser on player: ‘It put him off for 10 minutes’
Viewers are treated to ‘Champions League of fly fishing’ . . . and Crouch kicking a teabag
Barcelona legend on life in Japan, pining for football and the troubles facing his old club
Steve Bruce gets in the tractor while Peter Crouch reminisces about Keano’s glare
The age of Haaland . . . Nevin’s near miss . . . Nancy’s grave error . . . quotes of the week
Striker has reached promised land of Premier League, and hopes to score for Ireland
Broken tattoo . . . angry fan of the week . . . tall tales . . . quotes of the week
Wolves back to winning ways; Palace pull clear of relegation zone; Brighton claim first league win of 2019
Premier League round-up: Wolves too strong for Everton; Burnley claim draw after late penalty
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