Unfriended 2: Puts a sheet over its head and says ‘whooo, the internet is scary’

The second Unfriended is, we are told, a standalone sequel, which is a polite way of saying that it's trading on the success of 2014's Unfriended without any of that film's verve or invention.

Fans of those turn-of-the-millennium J-horrors in which modern objects like cell-phones and once-modern objects like video tapes turn out to be haunted will cheer on the opening beats. (It's no coincidence that Stephen Susco, making his directorial debut here, is the writer of the American remakes of The Grudge and The Grudge 2.)

Twenty-something Matias O’Brien (Woodrell) is attempting to create an app on a newly acquired second-hand laptop so that he can communicate better with his adorable deaf girlfriend, Amaya (Nougueras). But the passwords of the previous owner keep popping up on Facebook and Skype along with mysterious multiple messages.

Never mind, it’s game night, so Mattias and various chums – including tech boffin and chief of exposition Damon (Leeds), internet conspiracy nut AJ (Del Rio), lesbian couple Serena (Rittenhouse) and Nari (Gabriel) – sit down on Skype for an old-fashioned game of Cards Against Humanity. And then the laptop starts peeping. And a digital portal appears leading to the Dark Web. And Damon explains what the Dark Web is. And so on.

Figuratively speaking, Unfriended 2 puts a sheet over its head and says "whooo; the internet is scary". It is seldom as scary as a sheet. There are few interesting twists and turns and the mounting horror of too many message alerts and unsolicited Skype friend requests is, as in real life, enough to elicit a sense of dread.

The young, mostly box-fresh cast are likeable, despite being hampered with stupid characters who repeatedly do the sorts of stupid things that get one killed in a horror movie. The big ‘illuminati confirmed’ reveal is dumber again.

Still, if you like watching nubile youngsters getting nastily niftily knocked off in ways that never threaten to cross into Cert 16 territory, Unfriended: Dark Web is a decent enough excuse to buy popcorn.