Before the perfectly profound question of why, there is the how, when and the where.
Maggie Farrelly was an aspiring young player with her club Laragh United in Cavan when the club chairman approached her with a proposition. Any interest in becoming a referee?
His incentive was the county board threatening to introduce a byelaw whereby each club provide a referee – or else concede home advantage in the league.
“It was their way of doing a recruitment drive,” says Farrelly. “I was doing a bit of coaching, helping out with the club, and Thomas McKenna (the chairman) asked me to do the referee course.
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“It’s an opportunity that I never saw, an avenue I never envisaged going down to be honest. I was always interested in playing and coaching but once the club asked me, I thought it was an opportunity to give something back.
“I thought it would be for underage games or whatever and lo-and-behold I’m still here doing it.”
Indeed she is. That was back in 2008, and three years later Farrelly started on the Ulster GAA Referees academy for men’s football, finishing in 2013. In the 10 years since she’s made a series of refereeing firsts, starting with a first All-Ireland women’s football final in 2014, between Dublin and Cork.
Two years after that she was the first woman to referee a men’s intercounty match, the McKenna Cup tie between Fermanagh and St Mary’s; in 2021, she was the first woman to referee a men’s county football final, in her native Cavan, before in February 2022, she was the first woman to referee a men’s Allianz League match, the division four tie between Leitrim and London.
Farrelly, an ambassador for the SuperValu championship inclusion campaign, though on the national referee panel, didn’t make the men’s 2023 championship panel of 39; she is eligible for sideline duties. Four-time All-Ireland final referee David Coldrick didn’t make the cut either, after falling short on the standard fitness test.
“It’s a yo-yo intermittent test and everybody gets through it as best they can,” she says. “Same as the men’s but different levels.”
So to the question why: for Farrelly it was why not? It takes a certain temperament to referee in any sport, Gaelic football being no exception. Farrelly clearly has that, she wouldn’t have come this far without knowing exactly what she was letting herself in for.
If a player asks you a question: ‘What’s that for ref?’ There’s no harm in turning around and saying: ‘I felt you had a hold of him and you weren’t letting go so you left me with no choice’
“I said: ‘If I can help the club out in any way then why not?’ You’ll never win an All Star for being a referee. Everybody in the stands will find some sort of criticism of the person that’s running about with the whistle.
“It’s a very hard job, very challenging, nobody would ever put themselves out there to feel that they were just going to be abused for 60, 70 minutes. You don’t go out with that mindset. You go out to do the best job you possibly can regardless of gender.
“You are there on merit to referee the game and the 60-70,000 people who are sitting in the stands watching you and giving their opinion of your decisions ... You don’t see too many of them running about with a whistle in their mouth.”
On levels of abuse, she doesn’t differentiate greatly between the men’s and women’s game: the true consistency is in the underage game.
“There’s no question about it, most of the abuse occurs within that underage structure. The silent sidelines doesn’t happen, You see mad men and mad women going bonkers along the line for not reason because they feel the referee is wrong, inappropriately going absolutely crackers.
“It’s not knowing the rules that leads to their frustration and maybe anguish that leads to them taking the opportunity to hit out. But I’m on the same level as my male counterparts, why would I be treated any differently.
“Everybody isn’t going to agree with your decision but if you can explain what your decision is for – the communication piece is hugely important and from player to referee it’s important. If a player asks you a question: ‘What’s that for ref?’ There’s no harm in turning around and saying: ‘I felt you had a hold of him and you weren’t letting go so you left me with no choice’.
“There is human error but (mistakes) are definitely not our intention, it’s about having that refocus, if something does happen, so if you refereed the game again you wouldn’t do the same thing again.”
Farrelly avoids all social media, not for fear of abuse, simply because she’d rather direct her energy elsewhere.
“I have no interest, it’s a lifestyle choice. I’m not a tetchy person, I don’t even watch television. I prefer to be out running about.”
Typically she might run up to 8km per game, the fitness side of referring part of the attraction.
“I’m up every morning at quarter past 5 before work. I start work at 8am and finish at 4pm and if I’m training with my club in the evening time I head off to that as well. On these bright mornings I can get out on the pitch, otherwise I’m in the gym. I enjoy the whole physical fitness aspect.”
Her day job with the Donegal Sports Partnership, an education and training co-ordinator, is carried out mostly from home in Cavan. And despite being the first woman referee, in an otherwise men’s game, she’s never felt unduly held back.
“It’s about being patient, being resilient to the fact that I’m the first woman. At the end of the day I’m a referee, I do the same rules’ test, the same fitness test as my male counterparts and I’m treated no differently. That was the case for me, I felt that the opportunities were there, I had to be patient.”
The way she deals with any referee abuse, though always clear and present, is to promptly park it: “Because it’s about the next 60 or 70 minutes that you have to go to referee. You need to have the composure to focus on the game ahead, not be thinking back about what has happened. Obviously you give yourself time to reflect and watch back on video and make some notes on what you could have done differently because that’s what learning is all about.
“A committee has assigned you to a role, whether that’s refereeing the game or running the line or as sideline official, you’ve been entrusted on merit to do that job, you want to perform as best as you possibly can.”
Her ultimate want, like any Gaelic football referee, being a Sam Maguire decider.
“Of course. I think it’s everybody’s ambition once you get to this level. It’s like everything else, you’re not just going to sit at a plateau and think: ‘This is it, this is my dream here’ when everybody wants to be out in Croke Park refereeing an All-Ireland final.”