Country cousins come out on top as Neville slots in nicely

TV VIEW:Another one of those Sundays, the channel-hopping-induced befuddlement hardly helped by Tipp hurler Shane Long scoring for West Brom at The Hawthorns during a quick flick over from Tipp v Dublin at Croke Park.

All we needed was for Marty Morrissey to interject by hailing the Baggies’ “Gortnahoe Goal-Grabber”, before re-focussing his thoughts on the All-Ireland semi-final.

It was, it has to be said, a rare enough telly sight on the opening weekend of the Premier League, goals notable by their absence.

Newcastle, Arsenal, Stoke and Chelsea combined couldn’t even manage the one, as opposed to, say, the 11 the Dublin and Waterford minor teams gave us yesterday.

“Ah sure, it’ll be someone else on another day,” the Dubs’ Cormac Costello boasted of his personal four goal haul after the semi-final, his sharp-shooting likely to pique Arsene Wenger’s interest. Any code will do.

The RTÉ panel was, though, less than convinced that there’d be a Dub double on the day, despite Liam Rushe promising the team would it give it the mother of all lashes. Indeed, you got the sense that the Kilkenny v Tipp match programme for the final had already being printed, 80,000 copies possibly stored in the bowels of Croke Park.

“Tipp aren’t 16-1 on for nothing,” said Dublin manager Anthony Daly, conceding Kilkenny v Tipp was a likely enough possibility, “but if there’s enough collective will it can happen.” There was a bit of a twinkle in the eye too when he said it, maybe enough for watching bookies to put both teams at evens, but it wasn’t to be. “The Jackeens” were seen off by “their country cousins”, as Marty billed the encounter, but only just.

There’s always next year. Which, come to think of it, has become Arsenal’s club motto. Speaking of whom: were RTÉ trying to push Liam Brady over the edge on Saturday night when they played that clip of Cesc Fabregas over a tune that went something like this: “Please release me let me go, For I don’t love you anymore . . .”

When the panel reappeared on our screens you half expected to find Brady sprawled over his desk, sobbing uncontrollably, with Ray Houghton and Darragh Maloney patting him on the back and trying to convince him there was indeed life after Cesc. As a buoyant Wenger put it himself, “all the cemeteries are full of replaceable people.”

But the Newcastle v Arsenal game didn’t really do much to raise Brady’s spirits, the incident between Joey Barton and the sent-off Gervinho hardly lightening his mood. “I’m completely fed up with Barton,” he said, “he’s just an ordinary footballer, he’d start a row in an empty house.” Funny he should say that. At much the same time, Barton was on Twitter responding to criticism of him by Alan Shearer over on Match of the Day. “Bad shirt, shoes and views from Shearer again. Sort it out slaphead,” he tweeted, so it’s probably as well he wasn’t tuning in to RTÉ. Mind you, the prospect of Brady and Barton squaring up on Twitter is highly appealing.

“But there was talk of Barton joining Arsenal,” Maloney bravely reminded Brady. “Yeah, by his agent,” he replied, giving you the impression he’d buy himself a Spurs season ticket if Barton even became a Gooner.

Not unlike Barton, Manchester United’s David de Gea has had an eventful enough start to the season, less than stellar goalkeeping for Long’s goal doing nothing to silence those insisting he’s the new Massimo Taibi. Remember? The poor divil dubbed ‘The Blind Venetian’?

“He’s having a nightmare,” said Jamie Redknapp, “he doesn’t know what’s going on.” “Gary, what’s your view,” asked Ed Chamberlain, and the audience held its breath waiting to see if Neville would declare: “Well, Sir Alex has clearly lost his marbles paying £18.9 million for that plonker.”

Instead: “The good thing is he’s disappointed.” A fair point, one that had Redknapp nodding in agreement. If, say, de Gea had started giggling after allowing Long’s shot through him that would have been a worrying sign. Instead, he looked disappointed, which shows he understands what’s being asked of him here.

“And he looks like he needs to grow in to his kit,” Redknapp suggested, reminding the viewers that de Gea is but a child, one who, it must be said, looks like he hasn’t eaten since 1998.

Any way Redknapp and Neville (starting his first full season with Sky Sports United) are up and running. A promising full debut by Neville, too. As he noted during the Stoke v Chelsea game, when the ref turned down appeals for a spot-kick, “anywhere else on the pitch, that was a penalty.”

Redknapp, needless to say, nodded. Admit it, it’s pure bliss to have them back – adieu, cruel summer.