Sir, – In the forthcoming Rugby World Cup, how should the teams from Britain and Ireland react to the haka performed by New Zealand? This ceremony, derived from Maori war-dances, is more than just a picturesque piece of theatre – its intention is to intimidate. It is thus hardly sportsmanlike if the opposing players have no choice but to stand around and gawp.
A mild response would be for the visitors to retreat to the sidelines or the 22, leaving an empty space to dissipate the force of all those hostile gestures, grimaces and grunts. However, given that the haka is essentially martial, any kind of retreat might be considered wimpish or inappropriate and a quasi-military riposte preferred.
How about this: the visitors form two ranks, the forwards on one knee, the backs standing behind and when the haka begins they raise their imaginary muskets, take aim and let off a couple of make-believe volleys at the pseudo-natives pretending to launch a war. This parody of history would be as authentic as what the All-Blacks have borrowed from the Maoris, and would remind them that (and roughly how) the original haka-men ultimately lost out! – Yours, etc,