THE sight of the two young masters of the house returning, cold and sodden from scout camp in the Dublin Mountains last weekend was the unlikely impetus for these words. In one of those sudden outbreaks of lateral thinking that can betoken genius or advanced inebriation, it drove me to ponder big, warming winter wines - central heating for adults in the way that Readybrek is supposed to be central heating for kids.
Although you might not think it from the gallons of Cabernet which keep our supermarkets afloat, the rich, spicy wines of the Rhone are more highly regarded now than they have been for donkey's years. Their rise from the doldrums began in the early 1980s when America's wine supremo, Robert Parker, stumbled upon the Northern Rhone's great treasures, Hermitage and Cote Rotie. Pages of wine purple prose were printed, cases of the finest bottles disappeared across the Atlantic at the speed of Concorde and prices shot up to top Bordeaux and Burgundy levels. Before long the Southern Rhone, home of Chateauneuf du Pape and more humble Cotes du Rhone, began to arouse new interest, too.
Since then, boredom with Cabernet Sauvignon has sharpened wine drinkers' appetites for Rhone and Rhone style wines still further. The sheer variety of grapes grown is the essence of this area's excitement - for while the northern wines are predominantly Syrah, you may find up to 13 different grapes in Chateauneuf du Pape, of which Grenache and Mourvedre are the best known.
Enthusiasm for the distinctively rich, spicy red wines these grapes produce has spread far beyond the valley of the Rhone. In Australia, Shiraz Syrah Ossified - is no longer just a common workhorse grape, used for bulk production and blending, but the key to wines of superb quality developed by a new generation of talented winemakers. Only right and proper when you consider that Shiraz gave the New World its first "first growth", in Penfolds Grange Hermitage.
In California, the Rhone Rangers, led by wacky Randall Grahm of Bonny Doon, have blazed a new kind of trail, saving oddball Rhone grape varieties which were all but wiped out through Chardonnay and Cabernet mania, and using them to create deliciously different wines. In South Africa, similar moves are afoot. Even in other parts of France itself, Rhone inspiration is taking root, broadening the spectrum of red wines being produced as it enriches their flavour.
This international revival of interest in the style of wines once preferred by the kings of France is brilliantly charted in Remington Norman's new book, Rizone Renaissance (Mitchell Beazley, £35) essential reading if you're keen to find out more about a trend which is sure to influence what we drink for years to come.
For those who prefer to move straight ahead to practical research, there is endless, delicious scope. If you should happen to have bundles of banknotes to spare, even in dismal January, you may as well skip the list of suggestions below and start at the top, with the Cote Rotie of Marcel Guigal (who has been termed the finest winemaker on the planet), or Jaboulet's famous Hermitage La Chapelle, a thimbleful of the 1991 of which was a top treat at the last McCabes' Wine Festival.
For the rest of us ordinary New Year mortals - so strapped for cash that life as a hermit seems a more immediate prospect than quaffing Hermitage - Guigal, Jaboulet and Chapoutier are still names worth seeking out for high quality in slightly less pricey Rhone wines. The same is true of Paul Avril, whose gorgeous Chateauneuf, Clos des Papes, deserves special occasion status, both for its massive flavour and in honour of its Irish connection: Avril's daughter is the chatelaine of Kelly's Strand Hotel, Rosslare.
But, even a notch or two down from Chateauneuf du Pape, there are plenty of goodies to be discovered - from Crozes Hermitage, St Joseph, Cotes du Rhone Villages, the lesser Cotes du Rhone and the nearby Cotes du Ventoux.
All this, before you turn your gaze towards the shelves of dark delights from the New World. What follows is, of necessity, a tiny taster.
Whichever Rhone or Rhone clone you decide to sample, here is a cheering thought on which to ponder as you sip. This beefy, alcoholic stuff will taste far better in cold, damp January Ireland than in its place of origin with the sun beating down. It's exactly what's required to warm the cockles of a perished winter heart.
. Domaine Coste Rouge Coteaux de Languedoc 1993 (Dunnes Stores, £4.99): A good example of straightforward, easy drinking Syrah from Languedoc Roussillon. Aromas of soft red fruits and pungent herbs come through in the flavour, balanced with some oak to produce a very dry finish. Good value.
. Guigal Cotes du Rhone 1993 (widely available, £7.50-£8): From the King of the Rhone, this is one of the most reliable, well made wines at this price level from the entire area. Cherries and darker red fruits, spiciness and earthiness all in harmony with a long, meaty finish.
. Mitchelton Shiraz 1993 (Superquinn £6.99 and many other outlets): More intensity of sweet fruit than in the two French wines above, but the overall style is closer to France than Australia. Restrained use of oak results in a beautifully soft, plummy wine, polished and subtle, with a spicy little kick. (See Bottle of the Week)
. Rothbury Estate Shiraz 1993 (widely available, £7.99-£8.99): For a pound or two more, an Australian of undeniable class - gold medal winner in the 1994 International Wine Challenge. Black cherry coloured, with wonderful aromas and flavours of black cherries, blackberries, blackcurrants, black chocolate, and a good whack of oak in typical Oz style.
. Luigi Bosca Syrah 1988 (Verlings, £11.99): Our Bottle of the Week on December 2nd, chosen from Jacinta Delahaye's Best of Wine in Ireland shortlist, and worth mentioning again as an example of how a leading Argentinian winemaker handles Syrah. A little lighter in body than its Australian cousins, with cooked blackberry flavours, the whiff of herbs and pronounced spice. Intriguing.
. Domaine Saint Benoit Chateauneuf du Pape 1993 (Spar, Rathgar; Mill Wine Cellar, Maynooth; Lord Mayor's, Swords; Vineyard, Galway; Bradley's, Cork, £13.50):
If you wonder what all the talk about terroir means, hang your nose over a glass of this and inhale. Herbal, vegetal, smoky, peppery, and so earthy you imagine these Rhone grapes must have been trodden by ancient Roman feet. Taste and this intense, superbly balanced wine grows still more complex. Mr Parker suggests you keep it three to five years, "but it may last for 20".
. Domaine Chante Perdrix Chateauneuf du Pape 1989 (Moore's Wines, tel 01-4967617, £15):
While point pinching Parker scores Domaine Saint Benoit 90 out of 100, he accords this beauty, from a much better vintage, 93. Terrific intensity of colour and flavour in an exotic mouthful of luscious red fruits and warm spices. My Christmas dinner wine - and I'll remember it all year.
. Eileen Hardy Shiraz 1991 (Redmonds, Ranelagh; Galvin's, Cork; McCambridges, Galway and many other outlets, about £15): If you want to make your £15 splash with an Australian, try this multiple gold medal winner a Hardy's blend of the best Shiraz from each vintage in Padthaway, Clare Valley and McLaren Vale. A dark, deep, concentration of black cherries, caramel and liquorice - ultra smooth. Black Velvet.