Dáil Sketch: Joan Burton declines to show her vicious streak

The ladies have come a long way. Take Joan Burton.

You wouldn’t think it to look at her but she’s vicious. The type of character you’d be wary of meeting in a dark alley.

We used to believe Joan liked wearing red dresses because it's the Labour Party colour but now we're not so sure. She wore a crimson number yesterday for Leaders' Questions – the colour of blood. Quite fetching, actually.

But Ruth Coppinger saw another side to Joan.

“As Minister for Social Protection, you’ve swung your axe on women in a particularly shocking way,” she said, in chilling tones, to the Tánaiste

Ruth, it must be said, is not given to making jokes. Should she ever crack a smile in the chamber they’ll have to get out the bunting.

The Socialist TD was talking about International Women’s Day, which is on Sunday. In essence, she informed the Tánaiste that she is a disgrace and a danger to womanhood, with little hope of redemption.

Would the Tánaiste deal “with the growing problem of the feminisation of poverty?” Is she “embarrassed” at not having “lifted a finger in key areas of women’s rights” while causing “immense suffering” with her austerity policies? How about her party’s decision to vote against the recent fatal foetal abnormality Bill? Will she hold a referendum to repeal the Eighth Amendment dealing with abortion?

Prosecco

Then, for just a few seconds, it looked like Ruth might be extending an olive branch across the floor.

She returned to International Women’s Day. “I know where I’ll be spending it,” she told the Tánaiste. “I’ll be at a rally organised by the Rosa group at the Spire but where will you be?” Was Deputy Coppinger about to invite the Tánaiste to celebrate the day with her? Maybe a protest and a prosecco?

But no. Ruth clearly wasn't expecting Joan, with her track record, to turn out and join Rosa (Reproductive Rights, against Oppression, Sexism and Austerity). Not when the Tánaiste spent International Women's Day two years ago in the company of Christine Lagarde and her "a well-heeled head of the IMF which has plunged millions of people, especially women, into poverty".

Ruth finished her critique of axe-swinger Joan in her usual low-key way: “Will you celebrate International Women’s Day by calling off your economic war on women?”

In her reply, Burton was anything but bellicose.

“The women who are my heroes are the women who look after their families and their parents, who go out to work and make a life for themselves, their partners and their children,” she told her Dublin West colleague.

And then she began: “There is a saying in Swahili…”

That woke them up in the chamber. “There is a saying in Swahili that women hold up half of the sky.”

The Tánaiste followed this up with a lengthy analysis of ESRI studies and statistics, which she said indicated that women benefit from the social welfare system slightly more than men.

As for Christine Lagarde, Joan says the last time she met her they “spent a lot of time with women telling their stories of what it is like to be a woman in modern Ireland”.

Trapped

As to the question of where she will be on International Women’s Day, the Tánaiste will be in NUI Maynooth with women from developing countries, celebrating their achievements in building economic independence for themselves and their families.

“I’ll also – and one of your colleagues might be interested in this – have some time to celebrate with An Cosán, which is a marvellous organisation in Tallaght providing education for the community.”

The last time Joan was there she was trapped in her car by protesters for over two hours.

If Burton returns to An Cosán this Sunday, it’ll be interesting to see what happens. Particularly in light of her words to the Labour conference last Saturday night, when she spoke of “progress deniers” who “hijack peaceful protests” to make their point.

“In a free society, that’s bullying. And I’ll tell you something else: Labour women are not easily intimidated.”

And that’s apart from the jackbooted, axe-swinging executioner variety.