It started with a New Year's resolution to do something about her 'dirty little secret' of a house - now internet house-cleaning guru Fly Girl has 270,000 disciples, writes Róisín Ingle
'Just shine your sink, sweetie," says Fly Lady down the phone from her home in North Carolina where she is sitting with her feet up, answering e-mails and listening to Mozart in front of a roaring log fire. "That way you are not starting the day behind the eight ball. You will be greeted by this shiny object in the morning instead of a sinkful of dirty dishes. Do this every night before you go to bed and soon your stove will be saying, 'Hey, clean me too'."
Fly Lady - fly-fishing enthusiast and working mother Marla Cilley - got her nickname from the small group of women she began sharing domestic tips with in an internet discussion group back in 1999. Fly stands for "finally loving yourself", by the way, and it's in tune with the syrupy tone of the website.
The tips, routines and drills became so popular that she started mentoring people, and four years ago she founded Flylady.net. "Women use the internet much more as a community resource than men tend to. We started with 10 or 15 members and it just grew," she says.
Today, more than 270,000 people in 65 countries have signed up to the free service, which entitles them to as many as 15 daily "reminders" of what they should be doing around the house. She has been called everything from an e-mail nag to a Stepford Wife but members - she calls them Fly Babies - can't get enough of what her website calls "house-cleaning and organising tips with homespun humour and daily musings about life and love".
"I really resent the Stepford Wife thing," she says of a recent tongue-lashing she received this week on an Irish radio programme. "Some people just don't get it. I am not encouraging perfection, because that is not practical. I am no Martha Stewart.
"What I am trying to help you achieve is a comfortable, lived-in home which blesses you and not one that, if you know your mother or a relation is coming to visit, it takes you days to clean."
IT ALL STARTED with a New Year's resolution she made on the first day of 1999. "I had just been elected to county office. It was a job that involved dispensing a $30 million (€25 million) budget and I just thought, how can I can do that when I have this dirty little secret of a house filled with 30 years of clutter," she explains. "I started that day cleaning my 30-year-old sink, a sink that had not been loved. I took a couple of hours with it until it shined like a brand new penny. It was baby steps - I took on a new habit each month".
She also watched her husband's daily routine. "He is what we call BO - Born Organised," she says of the judge who is her third husband. "I could set my watch by him; he hit the bathroom straight away and it took him 19 minutes exactly having a shower. I am one of those creative people who had tended to believe that routines are straitjackets which stop us from being creative. In fact I have discovered the opposite - that routines allow us more time to be spontaneous."
Fly Lady now has de-cluttering down to a fine art, aiming to make housekeeping less of a punishment and more of a game à la Mary Poppins. Her website is peppered with acronyms such as CHAOS (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome) and SHE (Sidetracked Home Executive). She recommends routines such as the "27-Fling Boogie", where you find 27 items to throw out. She talks about those "hot spots" around the house, which become dumping grounds for everything. Her first book, Sink Reflections, was followed by Body Clutter. Being a Fly Lady is now a full-time job for Cilley, who employs 24 people and turns 50 next week.
BUT WHILE CONVERTS to the cult of Fly Lady write glowing testimonials to her methods, criticism has come from those who don't like the idea that husbands, partners or children are not factored into her housekeeping equation. She is well used to fielding this kind of criticism.
"The fact is that men don't really care how the house looks, it doesn't weigh heavy on them," she sighs. "In the majority of cases it's the women of the house who bear the guilt, the shame eats away at our souls and it keeps us weighed down. I am just saying don't beat yourself up about it; take 15 minutes in the morning and 15 minutes at night to do these routines, it makes a difference to your life. And you'll be amazed how these routines will catch on with the kids and your husband. If you are not a martyr about it, if you do these things with love, it is infectious."
Accusations that her methods are anti-feminist roll off her like water from a sparkling sink. "I once helped declutter the home of an 85-year-old woman, a former professor at an Ivy League college, who told me anyone who said I wasn't a feminist should contact her," she says. "She said what I do is free women up to find out who they are.
"We are told from the day we are born that we can have it all, a great job, a husband a family - but nobody ever gave us an instruction manual. That is where Fly Lady comes in."
[ www.flylady.net ]
Marla's methods: four ways to fly
The 27-Fling Boogie
Go through your home as fast as you can with a rubbish bin collecting 27 things to throw away. Throw the bag away without looking inside. When you have finished go back and collect 27 items to donate to charity. Fly Lady likes to sing "please release me, let me go" while doing this exercise.
Hot Spot Fire Drill
Fly Lady describes hot spots as those places in the home that become dumping grounds for all sorts of miscellaneous clutter. She recommends that every now and then you have a fire drill where you clear all hot spots. "Remember, clutter attracts clutter," warns Fly Lady.
The Five-Minute Room Rescue
This is where you spend five minutes clearing a path through the worst room in the house - the room you'd never bring a guest into. "Just five minutes a day for the next 27 days and you will have a place that you can be proud to take anyone," Fly Lady claims.
Swish and Swipe
Fly Lady does this around her bathroom every day. It takes, she says, one minute. The mirror, taps, sink and all counters should be "swiped" with window cleaner and kitchen paper. Give the toilet a "swish" with a toilet brush doused in cleaning product. Take the kitchen paper and wipe around the toilet rim, the floor and the back of the toilet. "This way your bathroom is always fresh as a daisy," says Fly Lady.