Parents' council needs help to help parents

The National Parents' Council (Primary) is running a course this autumn for volunteers interested in staffing their helpline. There are 10 places on the course, which starts on Tuesday, October 13th. Running every Tuesday from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. until December, the course will cover listening skills, child development theory, personal awareness, issues surrounding education policy and the role of the council in the education system.

Hazel Lyder is the helpline co-ordinator. "We get all sorts of queries from parents," she says. "We get lots related to school policy - for instance, I recently took a call from a parent whose children were at a school where the children were being asked to pay fees for classes which weren't extra-curricular. This mother had four children at the school so it would be quite a financial burden. "We would give parents any relevant information, but what we would be inclined to stress is communication skills - so as not to get people's backs up.

"We also get questions on bullying, transport, schoolyard supervision, school bags, homework; queries from parents of minority groups on subjects like religion; everything and anything to do with school really. "You can get calls from very distressed parents. Usually these are parents who have gone some of the way down the road trying to address a problem, but feel they are not getting anywhere. These are calls which you have to deal with particularly sensitively."

One of the most common problems the volunteers on the helpline encounter is the quality of parents' relationship with their children's teacher. "In some school there isn't a lot of interaction between parent and teacher. Often parents are reluctant to raise issues as they don't want their child seen as a `problem child', or to label themselves as `trouble makers'. They don't want to make a fuss, so often the problem is ignored. "Sadly this means that what starts out as a small problem can fester and grow. On the helpline we'd encourage parents to talk things through with the teacher - it is often possible to make a constructive intervention early that will save anxiety later."

Even approaching the teacher about something as serious as bullying can prove very intimidating for parents. "One caller to the helpline was very nervous about approaching the teacher about a possible bullying incident. But given the opportunity to discuss the situation with someone, she was able to look at her own fear of the teacher. "She also found it helpful to talk about feelings the teacher might have about working with parents. During the call she was able to form a clear idea of what she wanted from a meeting with the teacher. When she did go and meet the teacher she was ready to listen as well as air her own concerns. "The result was a mutually agreed plan between the parent and teacher which left the child much happier in school."

It isn't always that easy. Teachers may feel threatened by a parent, they may deny an incident or they may simply not be aware of a problem, Lyder says. "On such calls the helpline facilitates parents to look at their approach and see if there is room for doing things differently - for instance we might talk to the parents about how they like to be approached."

Parents who are interested in participating in the course and working on the helpline should contact the National Parents Council (Primary) for an application form (tel: (01) 678 9980).