An elderly woman who spent her life caring for people, including her son and brother who both died of AIDS-related illnesses, said yesterday she felt her life was wasted.
In an emotional moment at the Lindsay tribunal, the woman said she had promised her mother, who died when she was young, that she would care for her brother, a haemophiliac, but "it was no use really". He contracted HIV and hepatitis C and died in 1991.
Her son was also a haemophiliac who received both the cyro-precipitate and Factor 8 blood-clotting agents. "We trusted the blood bank at that stage," she said.
He moved to work in Dublin and suddenly stopped contacting the family. His mother, who used the name Brenda to protect her identity, said she knew something was wrong. Eventually he wrote home in 1985 and told them he was HIV-positive.
Her husband, who died in 1992, carried the letter around in his pocket until it fell asunder.
"My husband took it badly. He hated to see him suffer. My son died in January 1995, aged 38. We were glad his father was gone before him because he would not have been able to cope," she said.
Brenda said her son got no counselling and had to pay for a psychotherapist. Even in the end there was little help and she was exhausted caring for him around the clock.
"I'd settle him down, shut the door and leave him to the Lord because I had to get some sleep," she said.
Towards the end he had a very high temperature and was admitted to hospital in Cork where he fell out of his bed. His family wanted the sides of the bed pulled up but the staff said he would be fine and told them to go for tea. When they returned he was being picked up off the floor.
She said her son was very nervous of dying in hospital because he did not want to be put in a bag and zipped up. Later that night in the hospital they thought he was going to die and asked for an ambulance to take him home.
None was available and they had to take him home by car. He died at home.
Brenda said she would like to know why the Blood Transfusion Service Board did not react immediately and withdraw clotting agents when they found they were contaminated. She also felt the Department of Health was slow to react and she wanted to know if the Drugs Advisory Board had any function in what happened.
"It's important we find out why all those things happened. It concerns every man, woman and child in the country because nobody knows who will need the next transfusion and people need to have confidence in it."